A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm a 19 y/o female student and I have this burning question within me for a year already, and I don't exactly know where to get my answers so I thought I'd give this platform a try.Anyway, I have a HUGE crush on a same-gender female teacher who is 7 years older, totally straight, a pretty religious Christian, and dating a guy.She taught me last year, and I admired her since the first day she taught me, but I never expected it to turn out into a full-blown crush.I've been asking some of my friends for advice and some of them give really bad advice e.g. cut all contact with that teacher, never mention her again, make sure she stays out of my sight etc. , which is impossible because I still see that teacher in school, until I graduate next year.So I just want to know ways to get over this teacher crush, because I feel bad about this crush. I really like this teacher, she made me feel special and cared for. She says that I can drop by her office if I ever need a listening year (none of my teachers bother to do that,except for this teacher, let alone I'm a super quiet and shy student in all my classes)I think she knows that I have a crush on her because I stutter and say stupid things in front of her and honestly it's really embarrassing but strangely, she doesn't mention anything about it.I know teachers are off limits and I will never touch her nor ask her to date me because I don't want to put my teacher's job (and my own education) at risk but I'm honestly just very confused.Thank you for reading and in advance, for the people who have the credentials or experience in answering this question. :)
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christian, crush, my teacher, shy Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for the advices :) I hope all goes well
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2017): All you can do is let the feelings pass. You can't just put gay-moves on someone you know to be a straight-person. You would place yourself in embarrassing, if not dangerous, situations.
You have to learn and practice self-control. You can't have everything your heart desires. So you put your mind at-ease by just telling yourself how impossible this situation is.
Your hormones are just going crazy; and that is totally normal, sweetheart. I'm gay and I've been down this road too.
I had a very handsome gym-teacher; and rumors were flying that he had a boyfriend. During those times, people were forced to hide in the closet; or lose their jobs. He was very nice to me, and I crushed very hard on him. I heard the rumors, and wished he would notice me. I was only 15! I just ignored my urges. I fantasized and had dreams about him! It was all I could do not to stare. The feelings finally went away. He got a job in another state. I suppose because of the rumors being spread about him. He never laid a hand on any of us inappropriately!
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 September 2017):
 When you feel yourself thinking about her, distract yourself. Read a book, play a game, go on social media. Crushes do happen but it will get easier. The more you tell yourself it cannot happen the more you will believe it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2017): Hi! I am younger than you, but have nearly exactly the same problem.
What helps prevent the crush from growing any further is to stop thinking about her and quit any daydreams. I know it will be hard to get he out of your mind, but just whenever a thought of her pops up, think of something else.
One of my friends who is going through something similar formed a friendship with the teacher she is crushing on. You can start by startig conversations in the hallways or holding the door open for her or wishing her a happy birthday on her birthday... And don't worry about saying something stupid, she is a teacher, kids and teens do and say stupid things all the time; I think she's used to it. As long as you are friendly, it doesn't matter, anyway.
It is good that you are aware that your feelings are only a crush. And even though, you cannot be with her, you could still be her friend. The fact that she invited you to talk to her may show that she likes you as a student/ person.
To fully stop the crush, you would need to follow your friends' advice and completely cut contact; which can only happen after you graduate. And then time and finding other priorities will help you get over her. It took me nine months without hearing from my teacher to get over her- but I think you might get over your teacher faster, since you will have notice when either of you leaves and will probably have the chance to say good-bye and thank you.
Best of luck!
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A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (15 September 2017):
 Haven't you asked this question before. If not it has cropped up many times. The answer is to direct your attention elsewhere: hobbies, exercise, sport and never forget the cold showers. Looked up previous questions like yours in our vaults.
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