A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I swear to the powers that be, about 90% of the people I graduated with (class of '08) or graduated a year below me have kids, are engaged, married or all of the above.Here's some annoying facts: Both of my best friends (who graduated with me) are married. One of them has been with her husband since they were 17; she just turned 21 and was married to the man the day before she turned 20. She also wants to start trying for a baby in January.The other got married last June after knowing the man for 2.5 months, they have a kid who is almost eight months old, and she wants to be pregnant again by October; she's also 21, her husband is 26. And about two weeks ago, I found out her younger brother (who has the worst track record when it comes to women) is married and going to be a dad. He and this chick he's with have known each other for three months and were together for a month before all this happened.My boyfriend and I have been together for just under 14 months, we've talked about marriage and kids and all that crap plenty of times but we're not even engaged, yet. And believe me, I'm really feelin' it. Everytime someone on Facebook announces their engagement, marriage or the fact that a "new addition" is on the way, I feel a tug at my heart. Don't get me wrong, we're both happy with the decision to wait on all that good stuff but it also sucks to know that we ARE being responsible and no one else feels the need to.I want to be married and have kids so bad and so does my boyfriend, that it really hurts seeing other people moving on with their lives like that. I've been good by not pressuring my boyfriend to do all this stuff and it's kept our relationship good and healthy... but how do I get rid of this bug before I start going crazy!?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2011): Most of those people you know that are married with kids on the way will be divorced in 7 years.
Really, it's that bad.
Enjoy your youth, do things, go places, work, learn, and have fun and relax. If you bf is good with this approach, so much the better.
Almost everyone I knew who got married younger (which was in our early 20s) was divorced by the time we were in our late 20's. Divorced with kids, broken families, broken homes, anger, jealousy, hurt all over the place. No, not everyone, there were exceptions but they were rare.
A
male
reader, soon567 +, writes (17 August 2011):
sounds like you two have your head on straight, married life is hard so take your time, however, he's not your husband and far from it. Never service a man like youre his spouse.Date, court and then marriage in that order. Sex comes after youre committed, hopefully as his wife, not his time being. Theirs nothing wrong in how you feel, this is the time you need to make sure youre compatable, if he wants to wait another 5 years for marriage then tnis isnt for you, but make sure youre not there collect 5 years of sprem and then kicked to the curb for a younger hotter one.
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