A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi guysi'm a guy and just turned 16 last monthi live with my mom after my parents divorcedi have a problem which i can't tell anyone, i'm attracted to my mom sexually. it's been 2 years nowi love going through her underwear, smilling, playing and wearing themi always sit next to her bedroom's door when her bf spends the night with her trying to hear her moan during sexi also have these dreams of having sex with her.i'm ashamed of myself sometimes but i feel that i love her so much. how can i end this attraction? i need help!
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male
reader, Niceman  +, writes (21 September 2008):
Hi!
I think this is quite serious.
Pls send message to me personally, i will give u some help how you can avoid this.
THanks.
A
male
reader, sivaharimani +, writes (26 May 2008):
Dear young brother,
First of all do not be panic and guilty about it. It is a natural stimulation only. more, it is oedipus complex only(sigmunt fred). It simply denotes that every child in this earth get sexually growth with psychological stimulation with opposite sex. More, it especially gets attracted from mother if u r male child and from father if u r fe-male child. ok?
In this age of ur life cycle is a high peek time to hormone changes in u which will make an abundant sexual feelings in u and great stimulations for having sex. One who keep on watching and controlling ur sexual desires makes u a good personality in ur society. actually in true words, this recognition of society on u is real happy and more than what u have an abnormal sexual desire on ur mother. ok?!!!
actually what happens u know?. u love ur mother a lot in a way that she is ur dear loving mom. but ur abundant sexual arousal teen age thoughts stimulated by sexual desires links with ur pure and sanctity love with ur mother thats all dear brother.
so, IF U FEEL GUILTY FEAR ASHAME ON IT, THEN U WILL NOT ABLE TO COME OUT OF IT. IF NOT SUCH GUILTY FEELINGS IN U, THEN SURELY U CAN OVER COME THIS PROBLEM. OK? so, plz do the followings
1. plz do prayer for u and ur mother to make u both good friends
2. pray for ur mother to god to keep her happy
3. pray for u to be a good personality in ur society
4. make some hobbies in u for ur relaxation
5. fix a hard task in ur life like becoming Doctor or any officer like even president of ur own country
6. feel in u that u a good and pure soul who thinks only the goodthings in ur life.
just try, i sure u will get a big change ... ok?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008): Dude, as much as i think it's twisted, i know the pain. I went through this phase for a while, the sexual thoughts, the prying through underware (now it sicken me) but instead now I have even worse sexual problems which i dont want to go into details.
Can i suggest something? Take a holiday or seomthing, move out if you can, take up some hobbies?
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A
male
reader, Hans +, writes (30 December 2007):
It sounds to me like you need to find a girlfriend. If you had someone in your life then you wouldn't be focusing on your mom.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007): This is probably the most serious problem I've ever come across on this website because this is probably the hardest one for someone going through it to overcome.
The thing is, it is nothing. Yet it's something massive to you. It's life changing to you. It's controlling your life in ways that it shouldn't be. You really need to sort this out as soon as possible.
I'd suggest you went to see a counsellor or a doctor about it. Seek the advice of what people below have suggested, I don't really know a lot on the matter.
OK put it this way. You tell her or she tells your something. Then what? You have sex? OK so you have sex then what? She dumps her boyfriend. So then every night after school you continue to sleep together. You marry. You have kids. Is that right?!
In your eyes it probably isn't wrong, but it really kind of is. If it's not what you want which I don't think it is, then seriously seek some help quick. It's hard but you can over come it.
Just sort it out quickly. And whatever happens don't tell your mum. That could make everything more awkward.
Good luck, and take care.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2007): This could be serious.
I don't think the biggest thing you can do is just try to clamp down and fight against acting on your urges. That'll help treat it in the short term for sure, but it probably won't cure you of this by itself.
I think you also really NEED to turn your focus inward and start trying to understand what is driving you to feel this way in the first place. If you understand it better then that will help you exert more control over it.
Your mother is probably far & away the biggest female presence in your life, right? And now you're hitting the real sexual years, and females are really becoming sexual items in your mind more than ever. Well, if any other woman in your life was in a similiar position (always around, taking care of you, similiar personality, etc), then having sexual feelings for her would seem much more understandable. But in the case of a person's parents/family members, our minds normally draw some sort of automatic "line" between these feelings that normally happen with members of the opposite sex. You just don't seem to have that "line" in full force.
I think some other girlfriend might help too. Just to put some sort of female presence into your life & mind that is not your mother. Just to make other females besides your mother be more concrete in your mind.
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A
male
reader, Richard_EMids  +, writes (14 December 2007):
 Hi - it's the Oedipus Complex. It's a deep, deep, deep desire according to Sigmund Freud. I never had these feelings, but then they are supposed to be so deep that you don't know about them says Mr Freud. As for going to a psychotherapist, they are likely to want to 'study' you as much as 'cure' you. So don't waste any money, they should treat you for free, if you are bothered by these feelings. My guess is that they will fade in time. The best advice I can give is don't mention it to people, especially your Mum.
If you are worried then go and have treatment. If you go for Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT)that will fox them, because their school of thought doesn't believe the Oedipus Complex exists.(Ha! You will blow years of university study out the window in an instant! Take a camera and record their reaction.) If you go for a psychoanalyst, they do recognise the condition and will no doubt find you fascinating - as I said, ask for free treatment.
Good Luck
Hey - I know this is serious to you, but really I think it's nothing. Try to resist the feelings. They will soon fade. Start focussing on some girls your own age. Take care
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2007): Hi, your behavior of going through her underwear and listening at her door having sex is not healthy....change your behavior and you will change your attitude.
Stop doing those things, and yes, I think you need some professional help....there is something going on with you that you need to figure out.....sexual attraction to your mother is very dysfunctional.....perhaps your mother behaves inappropriately with you as she is starving for male attention since her divorce, or you are trying to replace your Dad for your mom as you want to see her happy, and are just carrying it a bit too far....What ever, get to the bottom of it, try a cognitive behavioral psychologist, or ask you family doctor for a referral.
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