A
female
age
36-40,
*regano
writes: Hi Cupid. My question is a little long but I hope manageable. Recently my boyfriend of several months returned to America after a year abroad, when we met. We have set no limit date on the distance and the relationship is more or less officially over but we talk on skype for at least an hour every day and are still saying we love each other. I know time may tell but i am not prepared to keep up this emotional link only to have him tell me sooner or later that it's a no go. How do i cut the cord/move on/ get him to commit? ill see him for a week in january, but apart from that we have nothing planned. Thank you for your HELP! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (25 August 2010):
Not really, it's normal for people to decide they can't handle the ILDR..or if you want to stay with him, like I said as committed as your going to get is marriage.
A
female
reader, oregano +, writes (25 August 2010):
oregano is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the reply. I can't help thinking a closure email would be inordinately brutal, though.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (25 August 2010):
Yeah international LDR's don't work..Airfare is expensive, or can't take the time off of work or school. Someone eventually has to give and get a visa, if you truly want to be together, but why risk it? There's no guarantee you'll be together forever or if marriage is in the cards. Write him a closure email cutting it off. Say an international isn't ideal for you right now, he has school to finish and a career to search for in America, you have whatever is on your agenda, you are worlds away and you can't handle the distance you would like to see and touch him when you can't, Skype isn't enough and that you can't handle the stress of an ILDR. Sorry it's hard to commit in an ILDR because you never know when you're going to see each other again, what he's doing, and all you have is Skype. I know because I was in one.
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