A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I'm pretty sure I am pansexual, but I've never been with a girl, a gender queer or transgender person, but I find myself very attracted to them. I am very interested in having a girlfriend or a genderqueer / transgender partner.But there is amall problem...I am typiclly pretty shy unless I know you really well and only a couple people really close to me know I'm not staight. Is there a safe way to meet bi or lesbian women or transgender or genderqueer people? I've thought about online dating but im too scared to try it.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2012): I cannot help but notice the constant use of labels; "pan sexual" "lesbian" "transgender". I have found that these get in the way of getting to know people. Often times they are the predominant theme of many of these so-called dating sites which you have stayed away from, which is probably for the best. Finding someone based on a perceived label is always tricky.
The best advise as to be honest with yourself and others. I know from expirence that the best chance of finding someone is being open about yourself. Finding a group, or community is the best place to find like minded people and help you come out to those around you. There are many different avenues for meeting open people, including clubs and events.
Just remember that labels are often misleading, and your mr/ms right could be right around the corner. Keep an open mind and be honest. Best of luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2012): I can't speak for Canada but here in the US some high school and many college campuses have LGBTQ (lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgender/queer) groups or "clubs" where people of non-traditional orientations (and "straight" people who support them) can meet for activities and group events in safe spaces and supportive non-judgemental environments. If you are in school or live near a university this may be something worth looking into, as many of the people you meet there will fall into one or more of the above categories in terms of their sexual preferences. Mind you the groups are not there for dating per se, but if you meet someone on a social outing and hit it off then you can obviously take it from there :)
Best of luck xxx
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