A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hii, This is a relationship question, and im not sure on what i should do so im asking for your advice on what i should do.Okai im 16 years old and i just started dating a guy whos 19"Mark", My bestfriend hates him and told me that if me and mark start dating than its going to be a big mistake and she will go after Mark. I told her that its my decision on who i date and what i do. Me and my bestfriend "hayley: have known eachother since we were 4 years old and i dont no why she is reacting this way. I told her that i dont want a guy to ruin our friendship and she acted like it already has. I havent told her that i have made my decision to date Mark and give him a chance, how am i supose to tell her, i hate keeping things from my bestfriend, but i also want to still be with him.
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male
reader, Sound advice  +, writes (31 August 2009):
Do what you feel is right, other people interfere for various reasons. I let friends tell me who I shouldn't date, and you know what? I regret it, don't live your life not knowing.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHii, umm well there is this detail that i left out about my bestfriend Hayley, well mark went out with one of myne and hayleys good friend samantha and then they broke up but she moved on she is having a baby in january so i dont exactly no what happened with samantha and mark.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2009): No where in your post, did you tell us why your friend thinks it's a mistake to go after this boy. Have you asked her why she feels going after him is a bad idea? One of the key factors in making a relationship work is: Open Communication.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2009): I'd say if your best friend says she can't stand this 19 year old, she has a good reason to feel that way and doesn't want to see you get used and abused. I think he is a little too old for you, and possibly the fact that he is interested in a naive 16 year old should tell you he isn't for you, so use your thinking to make a decision on that, not your emotions over your friend being so adamant about the unworthiness of this guy for you..At the very least make him prove his trust worthiness to you and to your friend before you get too involved with him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2009): HiAt 16, the man that attracts seems like THE MAN!!!Can't say I blame you for wanting so bad to date him... but remember, she is your best friend since you guys were 4! Has she ever made a seemingly unreasonable demand of you?? Has she ever given you any opportunity to suspect that she doesn't have your best interest at heart?? Our best buddies sometimes know us better than we do ourselves. I suggest that you listen to her. Maybe she knows something about this man, but cannot tell you... because perhaps she thinks that you won't believe her??? Or maybe because she has some other reasons??? Look, if this dude is really the one for you then he wouldn't mind waiting for you and proving to your best friend that he truly is worth you... or satisfy any of her other objections. This will also show you if he truly is serious about you... At 16, you will meet many many men, but you won't have anyone who has been with you since you were 4. There are numerous examples of women that lost their friends for some guy, and I don't think that any of them are happy over the choices they made!!!So, please, listen to your best friend...and explain to the guy exactly why you can't date him... sometimes simple friendships are the foundation of the strongest relationships... So, don't rush it!!! Take Care
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A
female
reader, purple_goat +, writes (30 August 2009):
if he has a bad rep, think twice, but it is ultimately your decision. your friend needs to respect that. it IS your life, and you shouldnt deny yourself something you want simply because a friend thinksyou shouldnt. take her opinions to heart though, think about them, but this is your relationship, not hers. you have a caring friend who wants the best for you.
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