A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm confused because to most people including all my friends sex is a "big deal" [by that I mean emotionally like they always really like the person] and for me it's kinda just a thing. I want to care about it but when it comes to it have no emotions like I could do it with anyone and not care if we ever talk again [I'm not saying I'm a hoe cus I've only slept with 5 guys but I'm just saying that if I wanted I could do that] it didn't occur to me until today when I was with some friends and I went into a room with one guy and I sucked his dick then afterwards found out he had a girlfriend and he was calling her and I was talking to my other friend we were with and he said "shhh I'm calling my girlfriend" and I thought nothing of it and then my friend who knew we just hooked up was feeling bad for me and she said "awww I'm so sorry if that happened to you. I'd be really hurt". I wasn't though even though I had just done something with him.. it was kind of like I expected it... but it all starts cus I lost my virginity when I was only 12 and the guy was 17 and he tured out to be a complete asshole and we like never talked after that and I found out all that time I'd been with him he'd been sleeping with other girls. When I asked him about it after we had sex already he didn't even deny it he said "ha makes you feel like shit huh?" and I was only 12 then and that like really crushed me.I remember feeling like shit for months and now I'm scared from that experience and I know it's bad but I assume every guy's like that. When I do something with someone I expect them to be sleeping around and think nothng of it... I just don't know even though I want a good relationship, I never see myself being with someone who I'm the only one they do stuff with..
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male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (13 November 2008):
 There is nothing wrong with being sexual, but based on your posting, you have little regard for any kind of meaning in a relationship. It is never too late to expect a lot more, if you wish additional purpose in your life than just being used for sexual purposes by men who do not care about you.
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