A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So 9 months back I dated my best friend for a while, it didn't work out, our relationship was awful and she dated someone else. When the relationship was bad she would always come back to me… We want to be together but we can't until she's 18 but she keeps saying and doing strange things…She keeps going on about how she's found "the one" meaning me and that it's complicated, which it is. Then today I told her I was hanging out with my friend, she assumed it was my ex, she snapped and asked what friend I was talking about and what I was doing talking to her :/ Then she said she got worried I was with my ex… Then she goes on to say about how I was the only decent person she's ever dated BUT... I've looked on her Facebook and she keeps adding, talking to and meeting girls. It's like she says she wants me, we can't be together for 8 months but she's searching for quick relationships… Why??She hates me hanging out with my ex or anyone I could be with :/… Do you think I should just move away? What do you think about the whole situation? Why does she act that way, get jealous but search for girls?Thank you for your time for reading this, I appreciate it so much.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2011): It sounds like she is very insecure but at the same time she is behaving exactly how she doesn't want you to behave. I'm guessing that she has some other issues you may be unaware of.
She is insecure, which causes jealousy. She is insecure, which causes her to seek approval. She must be bi or she wouldn't be seeking out girls. She is only 17, which means she is still figuring out who she is. You're at least 22 by your age you have really come into the person you're going to be. There is a chance that she hasn't "found herself" yet and may do some major changing in the next few years.
My advice is perhaps this isn't the healthiest situation for either of you. Her behavior is concerning. Discuss your confusion with her and if she becomes defensive, know she may not be ready for a realtionship yet.
A
female
reader, StarryEyes101 +, writes (14 October 2011):
 Hey.I think she is just a jealous kid. She's probably worried that you won't wait the 8 months to be with her, but she is doing a good job at driving you away. I think she's a little too young in the mind for you. Maybe you should leave her where she is and move on. She's gonna hate it but I think it might be for the best.My brother is in kind of the same boat. He has been with his g/f for 2 years. He can't do anything without phoning her and letting her know. His phone goes off every half hour. She is completely paranoid. But girls like her drive guys like you away because they are so paranoid. If you want to stay with her and wait the 8 months you seriously need a chat to her and lay down some ground rules. Let her know she can trust you 'cause by the sounds of it, she doesn't trust you at all.I hope this helps
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