A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i have a friend whom i talk about current affairs, politics etc etc and most of the time he will say i'm not open minded and i'm too biased. sometimes he will stop talking about certain topics simply because he doesnt want to argue. but i want to talk and make my point. hehe. and sometimes he will avoid talking to me maybe because he feel its a headache talking to me. i would like to only talk about normal topics that doesnt make my blood boil but he is very intellectual and he will mostly want to talk about current affairs etc. he is a book worm so he knows a lot. but i dont read books. i'm not a bookish person. but sometimes i watch news and even watch documentaries so i wouldnt call myself an idiot lol.anyway i really like to be friends with him because he is really cool plus i also have feelings for him lol. but that is not the only reason i want to stay friends with him. he can be very helpful because he knows a lot of stuff. anyway being friends with him has been very difficult for me lately. sometimes i get angry when he says i'm immature. 3 days back we had a sort of an argument and finally he said i'm right. but i knew he wanted to just stop the argument. ever since he doesnt show any interest to chat and i guess i feel hurt. i guess i am too immature for him. i just feel hurt every time he is online and not having a chat with me.i just don't know what i am supposed to do. i want to be friends with him but i will eventually have arguments with him and the cycle will repeat itself. i really don't know how to be open minded lol. i will somehow get emotional when we talk about something. what do i need to do?
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female
reader, Thornbirds  +, writes (31 March 2011):
 I find your situation interesting. Actually,arguing with him is just your way of getting his attention without realizing it.You want to outsmart him so you can get your way around him.. but you see,you can't make a guy like you, or get interested in you if you always oppose to him just to win his approval, and that you are as smart as him or even smarter.True friendship has no field for the battle of the minds.It embraces all weaknesses and strengths of the other.There is no room for competition so they say, you can let your hair down with a friend. Everyone likes to talk and to be listened to. How was your performance in the battle? He made you win.Lol! Try a different approach next time. Just be true to yourself, accept your limitations, and appreciate his intellectual prowess. Go ahead, try to be a listener,you'll find out this approach wins more friends than engaging in an endless argument.. ask him," Are you Mr. Google? " When he asks why, you tell him, "because you've got the answers to all my questions." Who will refuse a compliment? Your acceptance of your defeat may serve as a vehicle to a lasting friendship with him. Good luck!
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