A
female
age
36-40,
*pringluv2
writes:My boyfriend is 52 and I am 20. We have been together for a year and we have a 2.5 month son together. We don't live together because he has a 21 year old son and a 26 year old son that live with him. He says that he wants to buy a house for us but I dont believe him cause his other sons are grown and haven't left the nest. Is this relationship worth being in because my son has no where to sleep when he goes over his house but yet I want my son to have his father in his life full time.. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2009): Please take my advice I know how you feel. My ex husband let his 22 year old daughter move in with us. keep in mind that i am 25 at the time and he is 48. She ruined my family. we have two children together. It will be hard for you to have a relationship with this guy and those sons living there with him. Good Luck on trying.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (28 March 2009):
I think you need to get tough here.
Tell him that you don't think it's going to happen and say that as your son has no where to sleep, then he will have to come to you if he wants visitation.
Tell him that you can't risk being messed around as you have your life on hold at the moment waiting for him to fulfil a promise that may never happen.
He's not married to you, he hasn't even moved into your place, so you have to play it safe here and put yourself first.
Sit him down and lay down the facts. Tell him that you want him to start looking for a place with you before the end of April, or you will have to end this.
House buying is an incredibly slow process so it's not like his sons will have to be out on the streets by tomorrow. They could find a place to rent together very easily in the next few months and you could help them move and buy them a lovely moving gift.
You aren't asking a lot for him to give them notice to move and get his life in order and start LOOKING.
Good Luck!! xx
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