A
female
age
41-50,
*lc83
writes:So...my husband and i SEEM to be good. It is just beyond frustrating at times. I can say for sure, i want sex more than he does. Is it just a hormonal thing, is it more? We're 28, happily married i think. I just want him to be enamored with me like he was before. I've even lost weight and gotten in better shape, even though he said it didn't matter. Just confused. Looking for input. Thanks so much. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, natasia  +, writes (8 December 2011):
 It is just what happens. To everyone. And every female wants the male to love her 'like he did'. But he won't - because what you felt was him on full-course, full pursuit - it was the thrill of the chase and the moments of satisfaction after the catch, for him. But after some time that wears off, and you just get him lying back and being comfortable. Think of a bear. He has the odd spurt of energy while hunting, but then comes back to his cave and lies around sleeping or tending his fur for the rest of the time. That is a man.
So you have to change your expectations ... this is a new phase ... be happy that he is positive towards you, shows his affection, and is still physically open and close to you, even if that is just cuddling you/sleeping next to you. You will probably find that there are a couple of times a month when he is more interested sexually in you. That will be when you are ovulating, and just before your period is due, as your hormones are different at this time and his body will sense it.
That is all. That is life. It isn't so bad. You get used to it.
A
female
reader, LittleMissMellie +, writes (8 December 2011):
From my experience this is a common thing. Woman love the buzz of the honeymoon period and if we are beautiful, fit and take care of ourselves we want to be noticed. You know what I do. I just back off for a bit. If it gets to a stage where he is still talking to me about work and im naked in the shower I suddenly don't let him see me naked, close the doors a bit, have a shower by yourself, get changed in the spare room. Do what you have to do to create some mystery and he will pay you more attention. Men are a bit funny like that, but they aren't too complicated i don't think. Oh and if you walk into a restaurant or a bar and you see a guy looking at you, it doesn't hurt to kind of smile and trust me when he smiles back your husband will notice!!!!
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