A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Sooo.. I have this "really good friend", let's call him Josh. Josh and I talk all day everyday, starts with a good morning and ends with sweet dreams. We talk about everything, our beliefs, how our day is going, family problems, pretty much anything and everything. So here's the problem.. Josh is the only guy I can be myself around, he is amazingly gorgeous.. but thats not why I like him, I like him because I can talk to him about anything, I can say or do the most ridiculous things and he never judges. About a month ago I went over to his house, he was still asleep, so I just got in bed with him and laid there. He woke up about 10 minutes later and we just laid there and talked all day, almost 6 hours. For the next three days that's all we did.. on the second day he kissed me, it scared me.. not because I didn't want it, but because it was perfect. Later that day he texted me and asked me not to tell anyone because of the "situation" (which is I'm 17 and he's 20).. I completely understand the age difference, but it still hurt. Well we continued to talk all day every day. Last week he spent the night with me.. we were cuddling in bed, and he started kissing me.. everything felt so right and we ended up having sex. When he left the next morning he sent me a text that said "last night was amazing, I feel so connected with you I just can't explain it"... two days later he came over while I was babysitting, we didn't do anything we just watched TV and talked. When he was leaving he gave me a long hug and he kissed me bye.. he's never done that before. I don't know what to do.. but I'm so scared to lose him, and he's not even mine. I've never hated the word "friend" so much..
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female
reader, AbandonedApostrophe  +, writes (3 February 2011):
My advice is to talk to him. Tell him what's up and what's going on inside your head. Don't forget, though, that if you are 17 and he is 20, he could most likely get into trouble if you've been having sex. I don't think there is much need to worry, but you seem to be pretty confused about what to do. It seems that maybe the two of you are moving too fast out of the 'friend zone' and that maybe you want to slow things down a little. It's clear, though, that you do like him very much, so you don't want it to go too slow so that he loses interest and moves on.
From what you've described, he sounds like a great friend and it sounds like he likes you back.
Therefore, like I said, my best advice is to talk to him and, no matter how cliché this may sound, follow your heart and go with what feels right.
Good luck with the situation and I'd love to know how this turns out,
AbandonedApostrophe.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): He obviously thinks of you as more than a best friend if he had sex with you so if you can talk to him about anything you should talk to him about if you two should remain as just friends or go to something more. I understand there is an age difference but it's not that high. I think you should talk to him. Good luck with everything.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (3 February 2011):
 I don't think you have to worry about losing him, because he's definitely into you. Bigtime. Tell him how you feel. I'm willing to bet that he feels the same way.
Just, be really careful. Sex with you is most likely illegal for him. You also don't want him to be a sex offender for the rest of his life because you two couldn't wait.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (3 February 2011):
 You need to talk to him about how you feel before it drives you crazy completely. Ok so it does sound like he likes you as well but that he is a bit scared of doing anything about it because you are only 17 and not legally an adult yet. You need to sit down and talk to him about it, tell him how you feel and ask him how he feels. Goodluckk.
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