A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:please help me for god's sake....i am going crazy and dont believe i am writing this....long story short,she was my soulmate...we were together for 2 years and were committed...we hanged out at many places and had become most important part of life for each other....she was a big support for me and loved me from all her heart ....we never missed any chance to meet as she stays in a hostel 500 miles away from me and visited once in a month....when i visited her place recently, her brother caught us hanging out together for the second time(he warned me earlier to stay apart because he thinks she is immature being just 18 while im 23 and he hates me ), i escaped from getting thrashed by god's mercy this time.....it happened last saturday...since that day, she is avoiding my calls and texts and thinks its not possible now....her parents are also upset with her and didnt even wish her on her b'day, this really hit her hard........she says she will have to sacrifice me because it is good for everyone.......she says that i will have to forget her anyhow...she doesnt have strength to fight with anyone for our love and that she is losing trust of everyone around her including her room mates and everyone are pissed at her, she says she doesnt deserve anyone and is on the verge of breaking down terribly....she said i was the best thing happened to her and she will always love me come what may and she is extremely sorry for whatever she is doing to me ....she said she cried the whole night for ignoring my calls but did the same thing next day...! she said she is just doing this because if she picks up my call, she will break down and her friends will complain her bro about this! she loved me a lot though...she has given me more than expected and was a fantastic girl....practical and sensitive...loved me madlywhen i call her from different number, she says she will meet me one day and explain...she wants things to calm down, but when i call her from my number, she just ignores it....i dont get the logic! sometime when we chat through texts, she shows like she is so much concerned about me and doing all this to save my a** ......she says that she doesnt want me to suffer because of her and her situation is very bad and hence she is keeping me away from it.....i just feel she is making excuses to avoid me, god knows!i even pleaded her to keep the relationship and cried on phone many times..i said i expected her to stand by it, but i guess she is just too immature to handle it ....she used to be so practical...i am looking at a different side of hers and its shocking! she was crazy about me ...she ignored everone and talked only with me....now it feels like she doesnt desire too keep it going, i may be wrong...she is damn scared of her parents and bro....but how can she let go everthing so easily? we were soulmates! i have become crazy and obsessed now ....i cant handle my emotions....i fought wth my parents to take me to some counsellor but they think i have become crazy by asking for that.....its not possible anyways......i know i am pushing her further away by doing this and changing the way she views me, but i have become panicky and scared to lose her ....she was an important part of my life and cared about me a lot...she has come to visit her parents, she said she will text me after 3 days and alerted me not to contact her at all as its risky....but i think she will be scolded and brainwashed .....please help....i want her back......!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (24 April 2010):
 Oh dear I don't know where to start. Firstly relationships like these rarely work because the pressure of all the friends and relatives mean the relationship begins on such a strained note there can be no easy place to fall.
Secondly you're 23 why are you asking your parents to organise counselling surely you could organise this for yourself?
Thirdly I do think you are behaving quite possessively which is undoubtably pushing her away.
I don't think this relationship is meant to be I think you should move away completely and have some therapy to help you get over her. If you continue the way you are you will be so miserable you will end up sick.
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