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male
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anonymous
writes: My ex girlfriend and I have been broken up for a little over a year now. While I still have strong feelings for her and would love to get back together with her (she was the one who broke up with me), I feel like I live a happy single life and am not too hung up on her. I feel like I'd even be happy if she started dating one of the millions of great single guys out there. But she's not ... she decided that she is going to start dating one of my best friends.Now, right after we broke up, my ex started seeing this one guy (not my friend). During this relationship and about 3 months after we broke up, she hooked up with my best buddy (probably around when he broke up with his girlfriend). This was a guy I thought I could trust and who I confided in about my breakup; who I told how much I cared for my ex.Anyway, so I didn't find out about this right away. They actually hooked up several times over the course of the previous year, behind my back, while she was still dating the other guy and after those two broke up. A couple of months ago, he came clean with me (along with another good friend of mine who also had hooked up with her on 2 occasions) and said that he was sorry for what he did, that he hoped we could still be friends and that it would never happen again. Well, I eventually forgave him. And we attempted to be friends. I did not feel however that he was really sorry, or at least he didn't show me that he wanted to earn my trust and respect back. He continued to talk and hang out constantly with my ex, and on one occasion I had the feeling that she spent the night at his place and when I confronted him about it, he said that he was too drunk to walk her home so he let her crash there while he slept on a separate cot. He then went on to say that I was being really paranoid and that she was one of his best friends just like I am. I was really pissed off and didn't speak to him for the next month or so.Which brings us to the current state of things. I hadn't spoken to either of them for a while so I IMed my ex a couple of days ago just to chat and see how things were. The next day she IMed me to chat and this is when the truth came out. They are dating, or at least not officialy, but they are talking about things and would like to date but are unsure about things because they don't want to ruin their friendship, and he is moving to NYC while she still has another year of school left. I found it funny that she was the one who had to tell me this and he didn't have the balls. She is even planning on subletting his roomates apartment over the summer, so they'll be living together for a few months!!??Anyway, I told her as best I could without getting angry that they could date, I can respect that but I am not going to be a part of it. I am going to have remove myself from both of their lives. That's the short version of it, but I don't remember everything I said. I am really disappointed in my friend. And I still really really miss my ex. I wish that I could find someone else to get my mind of her. What do you guys think about my situation? I know I'm probably taking my feelings for her out on my friend, but I am really upset. I trusted him and if my best friends are friends with my ex I feel like he should have had my back, even influenced her to come back to me. Not do this. I feel like that's an unsaid thing. I feel like he's being selfish. Please let me know what your thoughts are. I'm really angry and confused right now. Thank you.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2007): hi.. you are in a bit of a jam my freind but im sorry to say that ur mate should of been a man enough to say that they were meeting..But on thing i will say is look were he is coming from as well.. i am sorry to say did something similiar to ur mae but after i meet his ex which also one of my best mates he was missed to asy the least at me bu he go over it, but we aint as good friends anymore over what happened.. My advice to you is to forget abou ur ex cause she went off with two off ur mates not just him and she seems a bitch. so i would try and sor things out with ur mate if ya find it in urself o forgive him fully and ell him not to lie to you any more.. but again forget about ur ex and move on with ur love life man.. hope this is of some help..
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