A
male
age
36-40,
*licss
writes:Hey all, I kinda in a tough spot and it's been bothering me for days now. A little over 2 years ago, I met this girl at my job. She was everything I was looking for in a girl, she was funny, cute, smart, etc. The only thing that sucked about our friendship was that she had a boyfriend of 6 years, but I fell for her, hard. It often made me depressed, moody, lonely, and just constantly down. To get over her, I just blocked myself from her and tried to talk to other girls. Well, It worked. I found this girl who is simply awesome in a lot of ways. We've been dating for over a year and I fell in love with her. About 2 weeks ago, the girl who I used to have feelings for broke up with her boyfriend and came to me for support. after talking with her for hours one night, I started to get those feelings back I had for her before. She then told me, she always kinda had a thing for me, even though she loved her ex with all her heart, she couldn't help it. Shocked, I didn't know what to do. This was the girl of my dreams and now it's getting in the way of everything. It's getting to the point where I don't even look at my girlfriend the same anymore. The other girl, just to clarify isn't a girl who is slutty, she has only had one bf for the last 7 years and she's taking it very hard, but for her to admit something like this to me, it's messing with my heart.
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female
reader, teencrushoffender  +, writes (19 March 2011):
 You should be helping her get over her ex, not trying to jump straight in as she could see it as you ceasing the opportunity at her vulnerability.If she had always had a something for you then maybe she should have broken up with him before , maybe she wasn't and isn't really in love with him. This love she still feels towards him might just be an attachment after losing someone so close who has been there for so long - it's like a part of her has been taken away and she's trying to fill the hole he has left in her.Time is a healer. With your support she should realise that the best thing that has ever happened to her has been right there in front of her and she shouldn't be scared to take it. You will be each others silver lining.Good Luck in Love.
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