A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My problem is this:My bf and I were fighting lately and that night we were also arguing for silly stuffs. I regret for all my actions while I was drunk and I did things that I shouldnt do for example, that night, my bf and his brothers were playing WII and I was bored (drunk also) like all of them...so what i did is that unintentionally I opened his draw and found 300 bucks, so i took them, just to play with him because i was mad it was kind of revenge for all the things that he ve done to me that made me feel bad, so i took them and i asked him for money for taxi so I can go home...so he gave me $20 and I left, I was feeling bad for what I did and Tried to call him to tell him about what I did but never answered his cell so when i get home he called me so so so mad telling me that why i took the money so i said for the reasons that I explained above..so next day he went to my place still drunk and VERY Furious omg he told me wanted to kill me(he was very mad) but I gave him the money back and he started to cry because he said that I betrayed him doing that and he never though that I would do something like that that I broke his trust on me, so he told me all these words to me and i felt bad because is true is not an normal action and it was very low what I did so i asked for his forgiveness that my intention wasnt REALLY to take the money because I dont need it , that my real reason was to scare him when he d find out that he wouldnt see the money...now I feel so bad because he called me a thief and he dumped me , im so depressed for what I did so I dont know what to do im feeling very bad because it wasnt really my intention to take the money for myself.....pls any advise any help im so sad now...
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depressed, drunk, money, revenge Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for responding my story, and yes, it was an agony for me. I talked to him and I explained what i did, I was deeply sorry for what I've done and believe me, I know that there is no excuses for my actions....but my guy forgave me wich I feel more relieved, made me realize that he really loves me and he told that what happenned is in the past and we have to rebuild the relationship again and start over again ..and of course we have a serious talk about alcohol because this was the main reason for my stupids acts and we agreed not to drink like the way we did...so im still not feeling well for what i did and my mind is not in peace yet...but my bf gave me the forgiveness and thats all matters I know that is gonna take a lot of work from me to gain his trust again and I ll show him that nothing is imposible.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): You booze you lose...just like that. The root cause of ur problem is alcohol and Im not gonna sit here and feel sorry for you as youre an adult and assuming youre not incapacitated medically, youre capable of making a wise decision. Alcohols costs outweigh its benefits. Now you know.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (25 October 2010):
 jmc930 has said it all..I'm going to add even though you were drunk you still knew what you were doing, taking that money out of spite. So don't blame it on the alcohol..because even in your drunken state you still had enough sense to call and try to apologize. It wasn't about the money..more or less it was about your dishonesty causing him to question if he really knows you that well.
Give him a few days to blow off steam then call him for a sincere apology...even if he doesn't take you back at least you'll have a chance to say your piece. Next time pick and choose your battles, and don't resort to petty theft for revenge.
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female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (25 October 2010):
I kind of don't get how it was supposed to "scare" him or teach him a lesson. I've heard of someone using "it was a joke" when they took someone's money before, and trust me, the person whose money was taken didn't find it funny. You're 26-29...it sounds like something a 19-year old would do!
Honestly, yes, you're in the wrong. It would be a joke to steal his drawer of underwear or something, but not his money--it's not cool. I think you're going to have to give him some space and try apologizing to him again later on. Even though I believe that you weren't trying to actually steal his money and use it, he doesn't know that or isn't even sure if that's the real story. Put yourself in his shoes, would you really be sure that he was just messing around or actually trying to steal your money if he took $300 from your drawer without you knowing? I know you're sad and you probably know what you did was stupid, but I'm sure in time he'll forgive you. Just give him some space and try apologizing to him again in a week or so.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): It was a very immature move on your part, honestly. Sorry if that sounds harsh. Also, you two were in an argument, so you didn't do it as a joke, you did it to make him even more angry. It would've been a joke if it was in good fun, but it wasn't.
Although you didn't intend to keep the money and just wanted to give him a little scare, he was still obviously hurt and angry by it. The fact that you had the audacity to do that to him is probably the reason he doesn't trust you.
Furthermore, being drunk so frequently (either of you) probably didn't help your relationship much. Think of alcohol as a evoker of dramatic moods. The whole argument thing between you and him was made worse by alcohol.
So, basically, think through your actions before you do them, and try to not let alcohol interfere with your life and relationships, because it definitely has in this situation you've described.
If you're interested in trying to get back together with him, you two need to have a sober, honest talk about the event, your intentions and how terribly sorry you are. If he doesn't take you back, let this be a life lesson to you.
Best of luck.
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