A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:He is autistic, he is very touchy feely with me, but when he asked me if I was attracted to him I said yes, he said he has a girlfriend. I know who his gf is. I am in love with him and I said this to gim- after I said this he invited me out to the cinema.. what should I do? I don't want to get in the way of his relationship do you think it was meant romantically? Thanks :-(
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (3 August 2018):
 It's pretty much impossible to BE a good friend with someone you CAN'T "have" and have romantic feelings for. Because when you have romantic feelings for someone there is a bit of ulterior motives, wouldn't you agree?
You were hoping (drunk or not) that he (by asking you to a movie) reciprocate your feelings. But what good does that DO you? If he cheats on HER with YOU - then he WILL/CAN cheat on you with someone else later on. Or he might just USE the fact that you like him for some casual sex with you, and THAT might hurt your feelings even more.
So remember what you did and learn from it. Don't beat yourself up, but learn to THINK before you act. Consider that treating someone like YOU would like to be treated.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2018): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your replies. I was drunk when I said it and wrote this, I know I can't have him in the sober light of reality. Feel like shit for doing it just need to keep my distance.
Thanks again
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 August 2018):
If you REALLY didn't want to get in the way of their romance WHY did you then declare your feelings?
Don't lie. At least not to yourself.
Him being Autistic is irrelevant. IF you don't think it's appropriate to go on "sort of dates" with someone who has a partner then don't. And like Jannie said, him being Autistic doesn't mean he can't or won't cheat on a partner. Which means him asking you to the cinema doesn't mean he feels the same as you. He might just see it as an opportunity to get a little something-something.
And take a good hard look at your own action.
I think you need to step away from this guy and his relationship. What you are doing (to his GF) is not something you would want another girl to DO to you.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (3 August 2018):
 Autistic people still cheat. They are not immune to outside temptations. He is inviting you on a date. Don't pretend to go out with him as a friend because you know what this is leading to. You should get away from him because he is using you as a side.
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