A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Dear agony aunts and uncles...me ad my boyfriend have been together now for 11 months, we are both 15 and have recently lost our virginities to each other. i have been honest with my mum all the way through our relationship and have told her everything, ever since i stared going out with him i have told her i won't do anything without telling her. well we had sex for the first time last saturday and i told her about it, i would rather she found out from me than one of my friends parents or anyone else. i was expecting her to go mad with me but she just cried. i don't know whether i have done something wrong by telling her? should i of kept it to myself?? why did she act like this? she hasn't reelly spoke to me since?? does anyone know why? Reply to this Question Share |
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2007): I have a female friend that had the same experience like you: boyfreind, mom crying, and it ended up very bad. Her mom was just crying and did not talk to her about anything intimate. Well, five years after her mother caught her with a plumber in the bathroom. They bought saw that man for the first time.Your mother is upset about your emotional beeing and in lack of self confidence she is aking herself weather she did something wrong when you started your sex life "so early". it was not like that in her time. Secondly she is extremely protective over you and doesn't want you to be involved emotionaly so you get hurt. It is extremely important that your mother takes responsibility for your ability to connect to people and develop relationships and she knows that. What she is doing now is very irational and imature. If she is angry and not able to talk right now write her a letter and write down that you love and trust your boyfriend and that she thought you all well all this years and that you did it safely and that you care about her. Write her that she has to trust you and that you have selfrespect and that almost a year was enough for you to develop relationship with your guy. tell her that it can't be serious relationship like somebody having 30, but also tell her that right here and right now you and your guy understand each other very well. Tell her that he means a lot to you without sex and that sex is not a reason you are with him. If you are scared and confused print out this text and give her. It is important for her to know that her job is not over yet and that she has to talk to you and stay close to you so you dont get wrong impressions about sex and intimacy. There is a lot more for her to teach you tell her that you need her. You are a great person, enjoy your life!
A
female
reader, XxAngelDust89xX +, writes (8 October 2007):
I am a 18 year old mother to be and I can kinda understand your situation. You care about your boyfriend enough to take that step, and it think its wonderful that you are open enough with your mother to able to tell her that. As for her reaction Your mother probably still considers you to be "her little girl" so its a big shock for her to discover that the lil girl who used to toddle around in diapers is "a big girl now". No matter how old you are or how mature you are, you will always be mommys little girl. Try talking to your mother and explaining that you understand that she might be alil upset and let her know that you love her and you will always be her little girl no matter what
Trust me even if she is still a bit wary, she will appreciate you talking to her and it will make her feel alot better, at least I hope so.
Good luck,
XxAngelDust89xX
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