A
female
age
30-35,
*evilsangel117790
writes:Im 18. Ive had a crush on this guy for two years now. I told him two days ago that I liked him but hes seeing someone else. We are still friends and talk to each other a lot. When I asked him if we could have ever been together, he said that hed never seen me in that way; just as a friend. Its making me feel really hurt and we're meant to go out with friends on Thursday and hes bringing his new girl. I want him to be happy cos he is a really nice guy but i dont know how ill react if i see them kissing or getting really close. I havent seen him since I told him that I liked him so I dont know if he'll feel awkward around me. He's not very good with understanding peoples feelings so he may just kiss her infront of me without meaning to hurt me or he might do it anyway, not to hurt me but just to make a point or just because thats what you do. We are friends. But I dont want to see him with her. I want to like her, but i dont know if i can be. In a way, I dont want to see him, but I do. Im definitely going out because Im meant to be with my girlyfriends but I invited him too because my friends are bringing their boyfriends. He said he would come with us and bring the girl he is seeing. I didnt know he was seeing someone. I can not go out because I invited them and I cant uninvite them because hes still my friend.They are not exclusive yet but by the way he talks about her, they probably will be soon. And he is really good looking so I doubt she'll say no.I would have told him I liked him sooner but there was a major catch. This is where you all start to think Im awful! I have a boyfriend who I love more than anything. Now you ask, why did you tell this other guy you liked him? I did it because we've been having really big arguments lately and I didnt know how much longer we would be together and I wanted to let this my crush know that I liked him before he went away to uni and forgot about me. But im glad in one way that he doesnt like me that way because now I wont be tempted to break up with my boyfriend for him. Even though I love my boyfriend and me and my crush would never be even without my boyfriend, It still hurts when I think of him and his new girl together and it'll be worse on Thursday. I feel so lost! I dont know what to do! Please give me some suggesstions in coping with this! Can someone please tell me what I should do about this guy?
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (7 July 2009):
You need to figure out what you want to do with your boyfriend.
You say you may not be together soon... then why are you dragging it out? Are you that great that you think he should keep you in his life for the last second?
If you love him but are not IN love with him then you don't want to hurt him by dumping him but you are hurting him more in the long run by keeping him around.
As for this guy you have a crush on. You need to take some time away from him. Go cold turkey on him for a bit and TRY hard to get over him. He's not for you and has a girlfriend. It will be easier when he goes away to uni.
If you see him all the time then you will never get over him so you need to take some time away and fill that time with other friends and adventures.
Good Luck!! xx
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