A
male
age
,
*effo365
writes:I recently met this lady through 'facebook' and we started to meet each other and on the third occasion we decided that she came back to my place.She was so keen on me and kept putting herself down and said I could do better than her, but there was no question in my mind that I had met my ideal woman and kept telling her so.On the night in question when she came back home with me,we ordered a pizza and had a kiss and a cuddle. We later on went to bed together where we had sex several times. While we were involved in all this she said to me that I didn't seem all that turned on and it then gave her a complex even more. This was due to very strong pain killers my friend gave me earlier which effected my performance and she knew this as she told me on the way home that these pills were effecting my drinking.I woke up at about 7:30 in the morning only to find her gone with no note or text.I decided to text her 'u ok?' and her reply was 'it didn't feel right sorry. my head is all f*cked up' to which I replied 'confused'.It has been a few days now since and she used to text me all the time. She said a few days before we slept together that I made her feel really special and has not felt like this for many years. I am left so confused over all this and am wondering if I should contact her or not and what to say if I did.Her facebook status read before this 'A ray of sunshine has come into my life' but it still reads the same because she hasn't been on it I guess.I really like this woman and thought we were going places but I really need some advice on how to deal with it or just forget it ever happened.Please help!!!!!!
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (30 June 2009):
 Your next move has to be to move on. Sorry.
A
male
reader, jeffo365 +, writes (30 June 2009):
jeffo365 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanx guys for your responses.The Lady in question text me the day after I posted this question late at night. She wondered how I was and we arranged to meet up,so we did and the relationship seemed to blossom.However the weekend just gone I stayed at hers again and we were invited to an evening wedding do. We had a good time but I was mixing my drinks to my folly but she only started to have a go at me when we got back in.When we went to bed she said she was tired and so I understood that but can't remember much after that.In the morning I awoke in an empty bed and so I left her a note in before I left asking her to explain why she abandoned me.She later sent me a text saying sorry but I am a lovely guy but when I have been drinking I am very abrupt and sarcastic and for us to leave it there.I really love this woman but it looks as if I messed things up.Any ideas on my next move?
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A
male
reader, jeffo365 +, writes (30 June 2009):
jeffo365 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanx guys for your responses.
The Lady in question text me the day after I posted this question late at night. She wondered how I was and we arranged to meet up,so we did and the relationship seemed to blossom.
However the weekend just gone I stayed at her's again and we were invited to an evening wedding do. We had a good time but I was mixing my drinks to my folly but she only started to have a go at me when we got back in.
When we went to bed she said she was tired and so I understood that but can't remember much after that.
In the morning I awoke in an empty bed and so I left her a note in before I left asking her to explain why she abandoned me.
She later sent me a text saying sorry but I am a lovely guy but when I have been drinking I am very abrupt and sarcastic and for us to leave it there.
I really love this woman but it looks as if I messed things up.
Any ideas on my next move?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009): I dont think it is possible for people to meet on internet places and have any kind of real relationship. I agree that you began to like the person online maybe not her or she thought that way. As you can see she seems to have issues and I would say you do to if you took Strong Pain-Killers from a friend, were drinking on your date, then had sex with her several times. Whoa! You could try txting her but I think this wont be going anywhere further. And if it does you may want to both have more of a talk about your past and what you are looking for in a relationship.
Please dont think I am being judgemental - But I have been thru the try at internet dating and I also just ended things with an internet cheater who took non-prescribed pain medications. Good Luck
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (1 June 2009):
I am trying not to be blunt, but perhaps that's the only way to discuss this.
Real personal contact is the tried and true way to know whether you can make it with someone. By "contact" I mean much more than chats over Facebook and three get-togethers.
It seems the lady liked who you were on-line. Also, she does not find you to be a person she would not date or have a relationship with. But I have the gut feeling that her putting herself down was not insecurity about herself, as it would seem superficially, but her way to say that she didn't find you quite right.
She didn't believe that the painkillers affected the sex, either. She said that herself in her response to your text message.
Her way to leave the place was not the best. I suppose she could have left a note, at least.
I don't think she wants to come back. She's had many days to do it, if she wanted to. But you need to officially close this thing. So, send her a message, talk to her, whatever, and ask her when she will come back. If she doesn't give you a date and time, or doesn't show up, you'll know what to expect.
Don't feel bad about yourself. You're in no obligation to be anybody's dream come true.
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (1 June 2009):
 if you really care for her or want her then text her. ask how she is and if shes ok and that you miss your chats and wish things ddnt end the way they did and you wish it hadnt ended. be honest and hopefully it shall pay off. what have you to loose ? good luck aphex xx
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