A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im seein this guy and have been for only a couple of months and hes already said he loves me because i am the first girl to treat him with respect. I have told him i am not in love with him and hes noticed ive been feeling down so i ended up unloading everything on him and told him im still in love with my ex to whom i split up with over a year ago. So i went to split up with this guy and he was devastated and said we could work things out but im not so sure because of my ex but i have stayed anyway because there is nothing wrong with our relationship. Now ive noticed my ex still wears the ring i bought him which i think could mean he still has feelings for me i am not sure. I split up with my ex because of drugs but i don't think he does it anymore but i do not know for sure. I thought i wanted to move on but its all getting to much to the point where i cry myself to sleep nearly every night now.. can you give me advice on what i should do? How should i go about things?
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drugs, move on, my ex, split up Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (18 November 2010):
 Just keep strong and as for the guy you just finished with try and limit contact with him because he will need time to get over you so try and ignore his calls or texts as much as you can. You dont need to tell your parents about wanting to get back in contact with your ex yet until you meet up with each other and see where things will go. Goodluck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much. I have let him go and he has begged me back though but i said i can't be with him just for his sake and that i'm sorry. I've told him i cant move on till my head is sorted and i know what i want. I also feel that if i told my parents they will not be happy that i would like to get back in contact with my ex. He only lives round the corner anyway so i'm bound to bump into him again but i haven't lately. Thanks alot for your help.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (18 November 2010):
Ok first of lets deal with the ex shall we, ok so he still wears your ring but girls think different to what guys think and it doesnt mean that he still likes you in fact he probably just likes the ring. To him its a ring it doesnt mean that everytime he puts it on he thinks of you, men and women have different ways of thinking. On the other hand i cant say that he doesnt have feelings for you as he might but am just saying that the ring has no significance. If you want to get back talking to your ex then i suggest you do that, as its obvious you are not over him and i think because you left him due to drug use you are now left wondering has he came of them and changed his life, the only way you are going to find out is if you get back in contact with him and see how his life is going and how he is now, just remember people can change in a year, so try and get him to meet up with you and see how it goes.
Ok now for the boyfriend, ok so you have been with him for a couple of months and it is obvious that he is head over heels in love with you, but you need to ask yourself after a few months have you any feelings for him at all, i understand that you dont love him yet but hunny if you have no feelings for him now at all then there is no point staying with him for the sake of it, i no that you probably dont want to hurt him i understand this, but it is better to let him go now than later on down the line when he loves you even more, if your heart is not in the relationship find the strength to leave and dont let him beg you in to it, you have been straight with him and told him how you felt which is a very brave thing to do, good for you, but if am honest i dont think you should be with him for now, you are not going to let yourself fall in love again until you sort out your issues with your ex.
Goodluck.
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