A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My 17-year-old son has told me he got engaged to his girlfriend, who's also 17. He said she proposed to him, and he accepted.I'm worried about this. I feel he's too young to do this but he really wants to do it.He said after he leaves college, he wants to enroll interstate at university in South Carolina (we live in Texas!)What problems will he face if he does marry now?? My husband seems nonchalant about the whole thing, saying "If it's good for you son, do it!"What should I do?? how can i convince him this is a bad idea??Jennifer
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female
reader, rambini  +, writes (22 July 2007):
 this is a difficult one, but as was mentioned before, the more u try to go against his decision the more he will stand his ground. perhaps you could talk to him and say that u will support him if he is sure, but how about waiting a year before they marry? officially he cant until 18 anyway without your consnt and i am sure he would want your consent, so try explaining that he will have ur support but maybe he should wait a year. as for university - good on him! at least he is going to one! too many young people give up their dreams for people they love, at least he isnt. good luck x
A
female
reader, DIE-romantic. +, writes (22 July 2007):
 Make sure its what he really wants to do. If he's ready for this, then there's nothing you can do except stand by him all the way and offer him support if it doesnt work out.
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A
female
reader, Variety +, writes (22 July 2007):
 Talk to him. If it works out this could be the best thing that has ever happened to him. If not he has learnt a valuable lesson. What is his fiance going to do when he goes to uni?, Go too? If so where will they live? Can he afford rent etc? If not...does he realise how hard a separation will be? Is he prepared to go out with his mates and be faithful?I think an engagement is a wonderful thing. A lot of you people rush into it without thinking of the consequences.If you talk to him then you will be able to help him consider this in the mature way he needs to.Message me if you want to chat.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2007): Don't try to hard to convince him its a bad idea. That will almost certainly backfire. Instead talk to him about practical things, how will he support himself? Does he expect you and your husband to support him (and the girl) whilst he is in college? Does he plan to have children? (ask I'm sure he doesn't right now but it will make him think).
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (22 July 2007):
 I was seventeen when i got engaged and now i am 29 and married to the same person with two children.
I think if thats what he wants you just need to let him get on with it, if you try to put up a fight about it you could end up pushing him away.
Let him make his own mistakes now he is an adult and has to learn for himself.
Take care.xx.
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (22 July 2007):
 That is a little young to me too but if he's made up his mind to get engaged there isn't much you can do right. I think with teens these days being engaged is the "cool, grown up" thing to do.
My sister got engaged to her boyfriend after only being with him a month and he's a total bum. My family tried to point this out to her but she wont see that she's too young or the engagement isn't really real. She'll learn herself eventually.
I would sit down with your son and talk to him. He may not be looking to get married right now. Explain your concerns and see what he has to say. Maybe he will see your point and maybe he can sort out the fears in your mind.
xxxxxxxx
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