A
female
age
41-50,
*an mitch
writes: hi dear cupid,good day! until now i don't really trust my husband. i always have doubts in my mind wherever he go and whatever he does.i have doubts that they still contacting with each other with his ex girlfriend which is his 2nd cousin.please help me i don't know what to do, this morning he has a caller no name appeared only the number of the caller he pick his cellphone and he only listen to the caller i told him who's that?why is it you just only lessen to the caller why you don't talk to.he don't answer me.i just want to know if he cheated me, iwant happy family but if this is the kind of life that i have with him better to step away from him.
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cousin, ex girlfriend, his ex Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 October 2011):
when people suspect their partners of cheating and there is no prior history of cheating then there is probably a good reason for it.
why would he not have his cousin's name in his cell phone? why would it come up as just a number not blank?
maybe you need to tell him "I believe you are cheating and until I have a better feeling about this we need to be apart" and then you should leave.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (7 October 2011):
Right now, all you have are suspicions of what's going on. You have a hunch, which are never to be ignored. However, you need to do some quiet investigation rather than outright confrontation and accusation. If you confront more without proof, he'll just get better at hiding his tracks.
Can you get his cell phone secretly and trace that number? Do you have access to phone and text messages? Is he hiding money or keeping odd hours? Any possibility of secretly following him or placing a cheap GPS on his car to track where it goes?
Now is the time to observe and investigate, not accuse and confront. Next time you confront him, it'll be with ironclad proof and not suspicion. Make him think that you've put it out of your mind and have forgotten about it. Get him comfortable so that he'll make a mistake. Trust me -- if you go after him now with no proof, it'll be much harder to catch him red handed.
Now, I've said all that to say this -- you do have the option of leaving him with no proof. Simply tell him that your marriage isn't working out. However, if you're wanting a happy family, this is not the best option.
Stay quiet and alert until you have more concrete evidence. You know, there's the possibility that it's just a misunderstanding. However, if your gut is saying something's off, don't dismiss it. Just be a lot more covert.
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