A
female
age
30-35,
*eangirl101
writes: hey this is a question that has been nagging out me for a long time now...its about my friend she has a boyfriend that lives 3 hours away form her she's only seen him twice IN HER WHOLE LIFE she thinks she's in love but this is just her first "real" relationship. i think he's cheating on her because like everytime she calls him he says i have to call you back cuz i'm busy and he never talls her the why and like the first day they met they started goin out and started "doin stuff" and i explained to her that she was moving way to fast but she got mad at me? so what else should i do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Chemer +, writes (21 November 2007):
I am not sure really. The fact of the matter is that he may be busy and he may not be cheating on her. I live almost 2 hours away from my GF. I do not see this as a problem as we get to see each other at weekends and she is coming up in the New Year.
If the relationship is going down hill then you will all know soon enough. It is difficult to keep a relationship going when there is such a distance involved. I fail to see why he would cheat anyway. The simple answer would be for him to end the relationship and go with someone closer to him. He obviously doesn't appear to care for the Girl. He seems to just not know how to End it.
Some people think that its best to be vague and be kind than be straight forward. I would say he needs to sit her down and say that its not working and that he wants to move on with his life and find a Girl who is more local. My advice is that she realizes this and moves on and finds someone nearer her as well.
Steve
A
female
reader, Star_07 +, writes (21 November 2007):
Its sad and frustrating to watch your friends go down a road that you feel will go nowhere. Trust me, no one wants these types of things to happen to their friends. But, she might have to work through this on her own. Im guessing you have been in a relationship or so, and you probably have more experience with these things. The truth is, people need to experience things to learn. You have warned her and told her how you feel about it, now its up to her. Im guessing over time, things will get messy for her. One way or another she will find out that her boyfriend is not who she thought he was. Something will happen. Be there for your friend when her heart is broken. For now, just be there to listen to her. You dont have to lie about how you feel but set a boundary for yourself. Dont try to convince her of anything or try to rationalize with her as she will only resent you.
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (21 November 2007):
i agree with peoraiman here. All you have is your suspisions and what you think, you could be very wrong he could be busy. Keep this to yourself until you know for certain andcan prove it to your friend. As if you told her now, the whole shoot the messenger game would come up
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A
female
reader, help_me91 +, writes (21 November 2007):
well i believe that you should just try to catch him in the act of cheating and have your friend with you. Because if you dont catch him in the act your friend wont ever beleive you..you just have to have proof. But try to do it in the nicest way you can. After your friend figures out you were right you'll have to help her through because she will be really sad. just stay by her side.
hope i helped at all.
love help me
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