A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my husband for 5 years, married for 1. Even before we got married I was having doubts. I still love him and would never want to hurt him, but I don't love him the way I used to. But now we are staying with his cousin. His cousin is always teasing me and touching me, even in front of my husband but from what everyone says that's just how he is. When my husband isn't around he'll put his hand on my head or pet my hair, not much and especially after he's had a few drinks. I really like him and I know about his past, he's been in prison, and I think I surprised him when I told him that I didn't need to see his paperwork to know why he was locked up. I trust him. He makes me happy when he's around and I laugh and smile more than I have in a very long time. And even when he's upset about something he does things to make me laugh. He even said that he just wanted to see me smile. I'm just so confused about what to do, and I think my husband suspects that I like his cousin because he keeps trying to touch me more when his cousin's around. Also my husband is the only person I have ever been with and his cousin admits that he's been with about 150 different women. The cousin is 37 and I'm 21.
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cousin, in jail, teasing Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Calum  +, writes (16 April 2013):
Don't do it you'll end up hurting people and potentially divide a family. Don't be selfish
A
female
reader, Intrigued3000  +, writes (1 March 2013):
 I smell trouble with a capital T. You're bored. You crave excitement. You crave adventure, but here's the thing. Are you willing to hurt your husband to feel that temporary rush of excitement? By asking advice on this website indicates that you do have a conscience and you know what the results most likely will be. The exciting, older, ex convict cousin who knows how to charm a woman into the bedroom, but who probably won't stick around to love and care for you after he has wrecked havoc with your relationship.You could probably give in to your urges and watch the life as you know it fall apart (Maybe you secretly crave a shake up or change).You have to dig deep and ask yourself why the cousin is so attractive to you. If it's attention or excitement, then you need to communicate to your spouse that this is what is lacking in your relationship and make a plan for the both of you to work on it.I think all these are experiences that will test the foundation of your marriage. Communication is key to saving your marriage. Tell your spouse what you need to make you excited about him again.Another thing...Have you ever thought about living somewhere else?
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (28 February 2013):
 Being married isn't like going steady with benifits. You need to reevaluate your vows. If they were made just for the heck of it then you are in the wrong dimension and need to "break up"
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (28 February 2013):
Get a divorce, you're not mature enough to be married yet. Dating and flirting is for BEFORE you get married, not after.
In the future don't get married if you have legitimate doubts about the person you're marrying, it'll save you and your partner a lot of trouble.
I would recommend suppressing your urges for the cousin until after you are separated from your husband. If you act now all he'll will break loose.
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