A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Perhaps I've rushed into a relationship too soon since my last one. My new boyfriend has become very clingy, and long-term oriented, but in essence, we've been together a week, and it's scaring me.We got to talking today and I realized that I may have agreed to date too soon. I feel that my freedom is fleeting in exchange for the companionship that he brings. I keep thinking we could be better off as friends.How can I let this guy down who is really clingy? He's been dumped like this before, early on, and I am scared to break his heart or hurt him like he has been. I know it would hurt him more if I waited this out, or vanished completely, but it needs to end for now. Thoughts? Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2009): My thoughts would be to talk about it to him maturely and calmly. For the most part you can tell you aren't ready for a relationship this fast since your last break up and if you explain this to him then hopefully he will understand. Just take things slow at your pace, it doesn't have to move fast at his own pace.
I am unsure what things you agreed on with him, but with only a week into dating it may very well be indeed too fast... you both barely know each other. You could break it off and ask to just be friends but you may risk losing a good guy just because you were unable to give yourself enough time from your last relationship.
Either way talk about it to him asap, the longer you wait the worse you will feel and the cumulative pain he will feel by lying to him will be too great when it crashes down on you both.
A
female
reader, bobbles32 +, writes (16 July 2009):
Let him know that you thought you could do this but it's really just too early. If you still have feelings for him, mention that maybe it could work out at a later time but for right now you just need to keep your head straight after your last break up.
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