A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm kind of freaked out about something (hence why I'm on this site): I'm not a virgin (only been with one guy) and the guy I REALLY like is a virgin and I don't know how he's taking that. I told him that I'm not and lately, he's been a little...not there. I hope it didn't mess this up...HELP! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2009): It might bother him or it might not.
If it is bothering him, then it'll have to. There's nothing you (or he) can possibly do about it.
The insecurity excuse is sometimes true but often it's not. Some people care and some don't. I think the people who don't care call it "insecurity" because they can't understand any other reason that someone else might care. But just because they can't understand any other reason, that doesn't make their explanation always correct for others.
A
female
reader, rockenit23 +, writes (9 February 2009):
regardless, you did the right thing. Good for you for being upfront and honest with him. Also, you didnt mess anything up. People have different experiences to get them where they are today. Dont regret telling him or loosing your virginity. If it ends up bothering him to bad, he's not for you. You deserve to find someone who will embrace you however you come. Your story is similar to mine, although the other way around. I am a virgin, and have saved myself for marriage. I met my boyfriend a year ago, he told me right off the get go about his rough past. At first i didnt know what to think, because all my life i thought of loosing virginity after marriage. At first, i had a hard time with imagining him with all these different girls, although i decided to still date him. While dating, i realised that if God could forgive this adorable guy for what he's done, then so could i. And still to this day, i never resent what he has done. Those experiences has made him who he is, and i love it.
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A
male
reader, MyDestiny +, writes (6 February 2009):
i think hes just surprised and scared.. now that he knows you're not as virgin.. he might be thinking "oh my god. this grl has ecperience and i have no idea what im doing"- he may be feeling a little insucure and he might be scared that you've caught something from you're first so now that he knows you're not a virgin it may give ahim alot of wories.. what you need to do is tlk to him gusdd luck
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A
female
reader, amyrechel +, writes (6 February 2009):
I wouldn't worry about it too much,the past is a thing we can not take back. So why worry about it?? Ask him if he feels any different about you because of you not being a virgin. If it does bother him, see what can be done to resolve any bad feelings. Heck, it was just one guys, its alot better then alot of girls having 10 or more guys they slept with. I think if he really is into you then he'll understand, if not then go on with your life cause the past is the past... Let it remain where it is...
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