A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey folks,There's a guy at work who I strongly suspect likes me a lot. He's always really helpful to me and almost always has a smile for me whenever our gazes happen to meet. He tends to single me out whenever he has the chance and even though I'm no chatterbox he makes a huge effort to engage in conversation with me. Despite our age difference (I'm in my early twenties and he's probably somewhere in his thirties), I really like him too. In fact, I've never really felt so much attraction for a man in my life and I'm certain I'd love to get the chance to know him better. I have no qualms about dating an older man. I actually think I'd much prefer it to dating guys closer to my own age. The annoying thing is though that despite this guy having talked to me for months, he still doesn't seem to be all that set on making a move. I'm waiting to see if he'll ask me out sometime, but now I'm suddenly wondering if I've misread the whole thing and maybe he just treats me like the workplace flirt or something and nothing more. I do fancy him a lot but I really want him to make the first move (call me old-fashioned, but that's how I feel). Am I just being impatient or paranoid, or both?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2011): Hi guys,
Thanks for your answers. I do appreciate the suggestions you're making, and I think I'll make a bigger effort to respond positively to him in the future to see if that will encourage him.
It's hard to let him know I'm single without actually telling him, so I agree that maybe he's just hesitant because he thinks I'm not available or something.
A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor  +, writes (18 October 2011):
 It's not uncommon for people to misread body language, intentions, and telling if someone is flirting or just being friendly. But the only way for you to tell if he likes you is to find out from his mouth/actions.
I like the old-fashioned guy ask out girl thing too. But we're living in a different day and age, so maybe you should take some initiation. Have a conversation with him to get the ball rolling. Flirt, and show positive body language. See if you could casually bring up during conversation what type of guys you like (of course it should describe him)- and during the conversation he should get the hint that you're interested. If he doesn't make a move at that point, then at least you know that you've made an effort.
Best of luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2011): I think its natural the way you are feeling, im not a feminist per se, but when it comes to dating, it is generally felt that the guy should make the first move. Having said that, he's giving all the right signals, so if you're feeling brave enough, suggest a casual drink after work or something, sometimes guys actually love that girls ask them out! Good Luck!
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A
male
reader, bugmenot3 +, writes (17 October 2011):
Does he know for a fact you're single? Also... maybe he just doesn't feel comfortable making that move at work.
Your situation here reminds me of the girl I really like at work!!
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