A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I was engaged to this guy for nearly 3 years. We had what u would call a fun relationship. We were always out n about doing things we loved. His mom eventually moved back in town and she didn't like me. We started having arguments a lot. He was always at her house and she didn't want me there. And she started telling him he could do better. He left me and came back 2 weeks later saying he made the biggest mistake of his life. Well things went great for a couple more years and I lost my job and was having problems getting another one. We moved into one of his mothers homes we were renting to own. Well I found a job and couldn't get a ride back and forth to training so I had to turn it down by the time I got back from telling them I couldn't accept the job he was standing on the porch with his mom. He said we needed to talk. He took me to a bench under an oak tree n said we couldn't be together anymore that things just weren't working out I asked him y out of the blue would he do this especially since the night before he told his mom we were getting married. I begged him to tell me he didn't love me anymore that it would make it easier on me and he said he could never say that. That he would always love me. Well I moved out n kept in touch with him until he called me a psycho. I realized then that I had to let go. I moved on started dating a really good guy and found out I was pregnant. I cried bc I knew right then that me and him were really done. I called him out the blue and just told him Iwanted to see how he was doing. I told him I met someone and had been dating him for awhile. He got upset and asked y would I do that. That he thought we were going to take time and see if we could be friends and work towards being to gether again. Well its been 4 years and I'm still with the other guy. We have to beautiful kids. But I still think about my ex all the time. I loved him more than I've ever loved anyone. And my love for him was so strong that I love him now the same way I did back then more than anything. I really had a love for him that would last a lifetime. I found out his new address yesterday and I don't know if I should write or not. He doesn't know I have kids so I don't think he would except it. Please someone help me. I feel like ove been grieving forever and I really do believe u can die of a broken heart. If it weren't for my kids I wouldve lost it. What should I do
View related questions:
engaged, moved in, moved out, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah I got some girl friends with good personalities there just all across the us. Most of my girlfriends joined the us services. Your in texas. GOOD OLE COUNTRY BOY!!! I'm not one of those giggly ones thinkin its all right. I know someone will get hurt in the end but I've also been honest about it. I don't hold my gaurd up. If you tell lies u have to back them up with more lies. Most of the people that come on here looking behind the backs I tell them exactly how I feel about them. At least be truthful. My bf that I'm with now use to live in texas. We live in georgia now. I hate this town. But have fun and can't wait to hear from u again
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI appreciate u so much. Yes I have done my wrongs but so does everyone else. I don't want to hurt the one I'm with now but our relationships flame is slowly burning out anyways. He's never home anymore. I'm always with the kids. Basically I feel stuck. I think of my what ifs all the time but the point is I didn't do the what if therefore I have to stand for what I have done. I really didn't do much wrong with my ex I mean we had the usual arguments here n there. Everyone does but I never did anything to deserve being abandoned and a part of me wants to hate him for that but I have to much love inside that I feel for him. I just want things to go slow get in contact with him see where he stands. See if the person I love is still inside him. But I am woman enough to say if I see that he's happy without me. Ill sadly yet gladly walk away. It will hurt but maybe it will be the closure that I need. So u have no one in ur life right now? I have a reason for asking but I just wanted to make sure I understood one of our conversations clearly. Talk to u later. Thanks
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI agree with you completely. See why can't there be more men like you. Open, honest, learns from his mistakes. Whoevers out there for u is a real lucky lady. You take time and care for others the way you want them to care for u. All honesty I look forward to getting on every night to see what you have wrote. It makes me feel like someone cares how I truly feel. I can be open n not behind any closed doors and u don't hold a grudge. You honestly tell me how u feel. I wish I could send u flowers right now. U don't understand how good it feels to have someone there n actually someone who's been on the other side of the field. I trust every word u say and I would always come to u for advise before n e one else. That means a lot. Thank you so much for being there. N hey I told u not to worry about the numbers its not a big deal were not having a love hate friendship already are we.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou let your love go basically to make a point of u didn't care but deep inside it killed u. All honestly I worry bout what I would do if I did see my ex again. I think I would try to say hi and strike up a conversation but knowing me I'd snurl my nose and act like I was better off wo him all because I'd rather hurt him then myself. At the same point I would hope hed come talk to me n then if he snurled his nose up deep inside it would tear me apart. Its wierd how all this works. Make them feel like u don't care or don't want them for them to care. I added the numbers LOL. There's nothing wrong with that. Do u have myspace. Well hope to hear from u soon
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your time I would like to add u as a friend and tell u how things go and seek ur advice if needed but I don't know how to add friends. If u could please add me. Once again thanks for ur help
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe will be an ass a mutual friend of ours was talking to him n mentioned me n he said not to mention me around him ever again therefore I didn't try any harder to make contact with him but now I'm willing to try. No I was not sleeping with my bf at the time. I didn't start sleeping with him until a month before I got pregnant so by then I had lost contact with the ex until I found out I was pregnant n called him out the blue just basically to hear his voice at the time I felt like it was my way of sayin goodbye. But I never said it. Then he moved n I wasn't able to find him until now. But I also just found out he's dating a 45 y old woman. He's 25. I will always want my bf in my life I mean we have kids together n he,ll always have a place in my heart but still the ex has it all. But isn't it crazy after so long still having the same feelings as I did when I was with him. Shouldn't I had gotten over them. I don't know how to approach him. I would love to arrange to just run into him to see the look in his eyes to see if its still there or if his loves really completely gone. He has never told n e one that he doesn't love me. When people asked he always said he loved me we just couldn't be together. I don't want to let go of what I have if there's no chance of my past coming back. But I don't want to hang on and hurt the one I'm with in the process. At least I'm woman enough to admit how I feel instead of hiding it n then just one day dropping everything wo a word n leave him just wondering. Most girls don't stand up for what they feel. I do. I'd rather be honest than lie. I know I have a good thing I just can't get over the ex. If I could just see him n know then maybe I could move on or rekindle the love I have. I don't know I'm sOoo confused that's y I'm here for help.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell when I started dating this guy I was just thinking it was going to be for fun. We weren't a couple we were dating. Both seeing other people. My ex even called me on my bday while I was dating my boyfriend. He was going to take me out. Then he called n bailed. The next conversation was when I was called a psycho. I didn't understand why he would do that. He said he couldn't bring himself to be around me that it was too soon n if he saw me he would want to jump back in it. Well when I found out I was pregnant that's when me n my bf decided to settle down. I love him and respect him but I've never been really in love with him and he knows that. I was never able to get past the feelings for my ex. I've already got my own place and job(I'm on medical leave right now) and I've set myself up. I just haven't found it in me to leave yet. I'm scared of being alone. I don't want to hurt my kids or my boyfriend but he truly knows how I feel and he's still by my side. But he too has left me before. When I had our first son he decided he wasn't ready to be a father n left. Then he came back saying that he couldn't let his family go n he hasn't left since. I do take a lot out on him though. He knows where my heart has always been. If I could just forget about the ex all together then maybe I could have something with him but I gave my heart away a long time ago and I never really got it back you can't make yourself love somebody
...............................
|
