A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:What do you do when you at home alone while your ex who your very much in love with still is on a date. Your ex who broke you heart by telling you he wants date others. Your ex who going to date hie bestfriend who he says he's fancied for time. Your ex who's now you friend which was his decsion. Your ex who says he still loves you and that your number one. Do you sit at home and cry? Curse his name? Hope it all goes wrong?or Like a fool wish him all the best. I'm not even sure if i want him back or to move on. When i'm out with others he's just at the back, i still think of him but very little. But when i'm at home alone or talking to him my feeling for him just take over. What really bothes me is that he's dressing up for this girl and he never did that for me. I feel like wasn't speical that my mum was right he was using me.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2006): I know just what you are going through. My ex dumped me after 8 years. She said she loved me but was not in love with me anymore. After a lot of anguish I've managed to pick myself up again, you will, but I agree the worst time is when you are home alone you just can't stop thinking about your ex - you run all these ideas through your mind they might come back one day but you have to be realisitc, this does not happen, they have made a choice to leave you and you MUST now accept that, otherwise you will just end up in decline. Try and get out more, take up a new hobby but do not dwell on the past, try not to stay in if it makes you feel sad. Don't wish him the best (as he has used you) or bad luck either. He will get his just deserts as he doesn't sound like a nice person. You MUST sever contact with him, how can you recover otherwise?? If you have everything sorted out (i.e. house finances etc etc) move on you have to 'draw a line' under it all now.I went out last weekend and for the 1st time in four months I didn't think constantly of my ex! To a certain degree I was relieved as you (and I) have both got our futures back now, no more getting trodden on by people who let you down. I am sure you will meet someone but don't rush it, don't rebound either as I am told it doesn't work. They say it takes 2 months to get over every year of being dumped from a relationship and I think this may be right, but 4 months on and I'm feeling much better about things, but like you, still pine a little bit when alone! In time you will realise he really wasn't for you and I am sure you know this deep down anyway by now. Good luck, your not on your own.
A
female
reader, Lynnsie +, writes (24 July 2006):
Well, find your date and let him be! You can not change him, dont believe "I still love you" stuff, that is just nonsense. Dont ever-never let yourself alone at home, spending more time outside, make yourself exhausted and go home just for sleep, keep yourself busy for a while and then you will get better or meet someone new!
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