A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid, im finding it hard to forget my first love. We broke up in 2012 yet i still have feelings for him. i tried so many stuffs to forget him like deleting his pictures, blocking him, going out with my friends etc but to no avail. I know he has moved on and happily dating. After our break up in 2012, i dated again but it couldn't last long since i thought i was going to be heartbroken again. When i think about what i went through with my first love, it breaks me down to pieces. Help me please
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys. It's appreciated.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2016): You were only somewhere between 14 and 17. Your feelings are based more on being "in-love with being in-love," than the actual feeling of love itself. You were quite young and your breakup was quite a traumatic-experience for such a young mind to handle. You've apparently spent a lot of your time dwelling on the past, instead of moving forward. Throwing things away is just an empty gesture; until you clear your head as well.
Perhaps you're bordering a little on obsession; if this guy is always on your mind. In spite of such a large gap in time.
At your age, the major reason you can't get past the breakup, is constantly stalking exes on social media. You remain stuck in one place; while he's moving on.
Seek a little counseling and grief therapy. It is a major loss in your life, and you're somewhat grieving. However;
you're still quite young and may spend a little too much of your time romanticizing on a relationship long gone. You should be focusing on studies, a career, dating, and having fun.
Here's a dose of reality and a small sample of what adulthood is about. You will get your heart-broken again. Over a lifetime, it's likely to happen many times. You can't deny yourself the pursuit of love and happiness; because you can't depend on the outcome of a relationship.
They are unpredictable. Even the best can run into circumstances that may lead to a sorry and unfortunate end.
The good thing is, you get a chance to start over until you get it right. There's a whole population of eligible and available people out there. You're bound to run into one that is right for you. Maybe dozens before it's all over.
That's the reason people continue to try to find a good match and learn to work at it. Dating presents you with a variety of choices; and teaches you things about human-nature. You get no guarantees in life, and it's sort of foolish sitting around denying yourself happiness; when someone else in your past is going gloriously about his life.
You never really stop having feelings for a first love. You just can't remain suspended in time; while life is passing you by and he only considers you a memory. Possibly a bad one. Be that the case, look at all the time being wasted.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 February 2016):
 It is always the hardest to get over our first love. You are scared off loving again in case you get hurt. That is natural but you need to take that leap in order to allow yourself to be happy.
You done all the right things, deleting all your memories, blocking him and not getting in contact with him. Yet you are aware that he is dating and has moved on, so you must be asking someone about him. You need to have no contact at all. That means not knowing anything about him.
If you are not ready to date yet, well that is okay there is no hurry. But you need to accept that you and your ex broke up for a reason. It was not meant to be. You will fall in love with someone again, but you need to allow yourself that chance. Don't think about what your ex done to you, not all men are the same.
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