A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I slept with a friend the night before last and am not sure what to do. We have been hanging out for the last 6 months and there has always been something there but I've really liked her personality and feel very close to her but because she is is friend have not known what to do. Anyway, unfortunately booze was involved and we slept together but I don't really regret the fact it happened (just the drunk part). What do I do know - should I bring it up with her or just not say anything and let things either play out how they will (whether that be a further relationship, something more casual or nothing). I don't want to lose her as a friend either as I feel we got very close.Also though, she is and has been always looking at my housemate and I've always got the impression she likes him as he's a fine human specimen!! (physically and personality) and even after we slept together she spent the day checking him out. They have gotten close as friends too recently (we all work together) so this concerns me but I don't want to be jealous or speculative this early on (or at all for that matter!) I hope she doesn't regret her decision especially if she'd rather be with my housemate!
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (25 July 2012):
 I can understand you don't want things to be awkward now that you have both hooked up, but if you ignore that fact then she is going to think that you just want to forget about it and she will never know how you felt. You are both quite close as friends already so who knows that the future will hold? The best relationships are formed sometimes from a good friendship therefore I suggest that you think past the one night stand and just tell her you like her. Just say to her that you have liked her for a while and that you would like to take your friendship further, ask her how she feels about you and reassure her that if the feelings are not mutual then you still want to be her friend. Life is to short not to take risks so just go for it, as for your flat mate, well try not to read to much in to it, it was you she hooked up with, drunken or not, therefore just ask her how she feels about you and take it from there. Good luck.
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (24 July 2012):
 You know, if you bring this back to the basics, if you like her, then ask her out. Forget that you slept with her in a drunken haze and consider the natural first step towards approaching a girl you're interested in.
Doesn't matter if you think she's looking at your housemate. She didn't sleep with him, did she?
If you start wanting to discuss or analyze the sleeping together with her, you could travel into the area of the awkward. Instead, why not ask her out? Start the relationship off properly. Having a conversation about wanting a possible one-night-stand to be more is being too hasty.
So ignore the roommate, ask her out, and if she says yes, then go for it. As for talking about the sleeping together, tell her that while you don't regret doing it, you want to know her more because you're not only attracted to her physically, you want to get to know her too.
If she has any feelings for you, she'd like that! Either way, you'll know. As far as worrying about losing her as a friend, you've gone past that whole worry when you slept with her. So why not go for broke??
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