A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have the instant messenger thing and I have all my friends on there. I’ve made some new ones and there’s this one guy that w/in the past month or so we have been talking on a regular schedule. Im married and he’s married and we both talk about how wonderful our partners are etc. Just a few weeks ago, we started with the intimate talk. We never have anything derogatory to say about our spouses but we have gotten to the point of discussing senerio with my IM friend and me. We ask ea other the next day if we thought of ea other while being intimate w/our spouses etc.I very much doubt we would actually want to meet up and go ahead with infidelity, but I’ve noticed it’s improved our intimate life with our spouses. Am I cheating on my husband with out being physical with this other man? I don’t want to physically be unfaithful, but I feel that talking to my IM friend is adding a little spice to our marriage, to both of our marriages. Is this wrong? What should I do?Thanks!
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (17 February 2008):
 There are always two sides to a coin. If you stand on this side , you will say it is right . If you stand on the other side , people will say it is wrong.
Just like the gay issue. Some say it is wrong while others say it is alright.
The knife is a tool for cutting anything but it can be used to kill .
If you use the knife to kill , then it is wrong. So does it mean that the knife is bad?
Some people say you are cheating if you have cyber sex.It is wrong if they think it is wrong. If a majority thinks it is wrong, it does not mean they are right.
You have to decide for yourself . If you think it is right , then why should you bow to the majority opinions?
In your case, it helped you to improve your sex.
You come here to find out whether it is right or wrong and I see many here say it is wrong and consider it as cheating. That is their opinions only.
You have to evaluate and apply it to your case.
You are the only one to know what is right or wrong in your case. You don't have to listen to the majority decisions.
God gave us a brain . So used it.
I usually deal it by my conscience. If my conscience tells me I am wrong and I feel troubled by it, I will not do it.
If I go against my conscience, I will be forever troubled and have no peace.
God will show you when you are wrong .I will not accept anything from 'Holier than thou' lecturers.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2008):
Hey, why don't you set up an account for hubby so he can talk intimately to another woman, how he would like to do her. And maybe he will have sex with you, imagining her..there's a thought. You might have fire at both ends,,there are alot of desperate women on the net waiting for anyone to talk to them, I would imagine he would find some hottie to score with quickly, since his wife is doing the same with another person...
Good Luck with that!!!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2007):
Yes, it is cheating even though you may not realise this.As someone else mentioned, talk can lead to other things. So just to be safe, you should discontinue chatting like this.
Wish you all the best.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2007): YES it is. If your husband was doing the same I imagine you'd not like it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2007): Thank you all, i guess i just need that reminder. I'll keep it to "friends only" if that. Thanks again!
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A
female
reader, Reebe  +, writes (27 March 2007):
 I personally would not be happy if I found out my other half was doing this. How would you feel if your husband was doing it to you? would it still be harmless fun? I think you know you shouldn't be doing it, but your making out it means nothing to make yourself feel better about it. You are sharing yourself with someone else even if it's not actually touching, mentally you are doing so, which sometimes is worse.
I would class this as cheating, if someone did it to me.
Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2007): I would say yes it is cheating you are getting thrills out of this and should that not be contained between you and your partner? I would just keep the conversation to everday things i would never meet up with anyone online you are married what are you doing? I know some will say it is just talk but we all know talk can lead onto other thins i would be polite and just say you don't feel right talking as you do and just want to keep the talk to everyday things i am sure he will understand it is just the not knowing what is it leading to that has you excited and you are getting a cheap thrill with hubby through this so i would quit sorry hope thats helped.
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