A
female
age
36-40,
*hortylove
writes:My question is why he keeps denying everything: I dated this guy for a year and half the first four months of us dating was fine in the fifth month he fell into a depression and isolated himself and the only person he wanted to see was me. So I supported him thru it all. He started to see a therapist, psychiatrist and went on antideppresants. I then began to question this guy what was going on and he said that he wasnt ready for a relationship. So i left him. We didnt talk for 5 months straight in which of course i was devestated finally towards the end of the 5 months I started to get over this guy. However who comes back into my life him. He called me up one day and we started talkin and he confessed to me that he had somewhat missed me. We started to hang out again and eventually I asked him what was going on. He told me once again he still wasn't ready. Basically this is when i should have ran but I stuck by his side again. After while I saw that nothing was progressing and I started to get fed up. Everytime I would tell this guy mabye when your ready call me he wouldnt let me go. He would give me the execuse that he cared about me and that he couldnt stop talkin to me. To conclude this story about a month and a half ago this guy started talkin to this girl from myspace who happen to be his old coworkers cousin. As soon as I saw that he was talkin to this girl online I told him if you start talkin to her on the phone you can forget about me. So a few days later what do i see that he was talkin to her on the phone. So I kept my word I told him if this is what you want then nice knowing you. The other night I saw a picture of him and this girl kissing. It didnt really hurt me but more bothered me because he kept telling me that I was going to feel like an idiot in the end because he wasnt trying to get with this girl. So for the first time I spoke to him the other night and I had asked him about this girl. He said Im not dating her I havent even met her. I was like why are you lying when I know you are hanging out with her. He was like whats wrong with you I told you i'm not hanging out with her. I just don't understand why he doesnt tell me the truth. I even told him that if he was that I would be happy for him and that it wouldnt bother me.
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female
reader, lovestolaugh13 +, writes (9 January 2009):
i think this man still cares about you, but because you told him you don't want to talk to him unless he is ready for a relationship it's hard so he is taking what he can get. the reason he is lying about it is because he still misses you and wants to be with you so he is lying because he thinks he still has a chance with you but because you only want a relationship he feels intimidated.
A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (9 January 2009):
 To be honest he seems like a bloke that gets all sookey (wimpy) when the commitment comes, its rare but a bloke that gets depressed because he has an opportunity to be with a lovely lady is quite weird, there are many lonley men that would never do such a thing.
Secondly, it seems as thought he does not want any commitment what so ever, even if he's with another girl, they could have some sort of thing where it will never get TOO serious. its probably just kissing and what ever. with you he knows is more than this. Therefore you keep running because he cannot fulfill your desire. Which also means you deserve better, and can have better too.
Thirdly, ask your self why would you want to be with someone so twisted when you have your head screwed on and he does not. Your between 22-25 so now you should be just enjoying things with someone like minded to you. Remember he's the one who sees the therapist, and you'll never know what else he has going on in that head.
I'd move on and be with a bloke that wants to be with you for everything you are and has the same goals as you, this way you will succeed and this old bloke will wish he had done better by you.
Cheers,
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