A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:boyfriend of a year and a half doesn't want me anymore :(everything was perfect when we first got together but he was doing all of the running as i could take it or leave it but now it's the other way around. he's really down and depressed and takes a lot of it out on me and i seem more than happy to put up with it but i'm not sure how much more i can take. it was my birthday last week and he wrote in my card that he's glad that i'm i his life and although we have our ups and downs it just makes us stronger... claimed he didn't have the money for a present - not so much as a box of chocs.saturday night we had a huge argument. he gave me a lift into town to meet my friends. he never compliments me or makes me feel good about myself like he used to - infact i feel really self concious which is not me. the ironic thing is he's an over weight 50 years old and i'm a slim long legged 19 year old. he doesn't have to compliment me but if he hasn't got anything good to say i'd rather him not say anything - he constantly makes jibes at me. i have a 30F chest and i am small framed so they look really big - i used to be really proud of them - not in a flaunting way, in fact i keep them covered but i still liked them. he's mentioned on various occasions me getting a breast reduction - hurtful! going back to saturday - he said could i get a refund for my outfit. i flipped out on him and ripped the shirt he was wearing off of his back, he didn't retaliate. he asked what i was doing, i said 'you treat me like shit, you're so cold and have a heart of stone'. his reply was 'i haven't done anything but now you've done that we're finished. after a while he took me to town, i asked if we are still together and is he talking to me he said yes.the next morning he didn't want to speak and told me we were finished!i know i shouldn't have lashed out and that he's a jerk but i don't want to be without him. he means everything to me.i'm going to meet him at his work place when he finishes work - he doesn't know.what shall i do to get him back?
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female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (26 April 2010):
 Why on earth do you want him back? He sounds immature and you sound like you are his 'trophy' gf.
Rather find someone your own age to date.
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (26 April 2010):
 You two are finished. You have to move on. You can't change him, or lift him out of his depression. And why on earth would you want to stay, knowing that he takes jabs at you and doesn't respect you?Every time he verbally kicks you like a dog, only to have you crawl back to him, throw yourself at him, and beg to have him back erodes at your self-respect, and takes away all of his respect for you. You don't want to be in that place in life, especially how young you are. It will be hard, but get away from him once and for all, and slowly build back your self-esteem and independence. He is NOT going to change. In fact, he's just done you a favor by showing you his true self, which usually happens in about a year when the honeymoon glitter comes off a relationship.Good luck. Find the strength.
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