A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:PLEASE HELP! ok see i have a best friend who has a boyfriend called sam, and sam set me up with his best mate kabir (yes his mums indian but hes british, but he follows the muslim faith which can intefere with our "relationshp" becuase his parents cant no about me) and we have been getting on great like he really likes me and i really like him and we kiss all the time but apparently he feels under pressure to ask me to be his gf and he wants to be a doctor so he doesnt want anything to intefere with that, and he likes what we have now, but i just kind of what him to be mine so he doesnt go off with another girl, also he told sam that even though i have only known him a week he thinks that when i invited him to stop at mine i would deffiantly have sex with him! im a virgin and hes not and i really cant believe he thinks im like that! and appaently he thinks this becuase i "tease" him, i am just very confused becuase i like him extremly and i dont want to be messed around i know hes intrested but i dont wanna get even more involved and maybe even fall for him if he is going to mess me about, what do i do!!!! also he is very hard to talk to about this he just goes really quiet and wont spit his words outHELP PLEASE!much appreciatedxx
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2009): The communication between you two is not good ("he goes really quiet and can't spit his words out"); you have known him exactly ONE WEEK and he already wants to have sex with you and is not inclined to believe you're a virgin; he wants to study to become a doctor and wants nothing (such as a relationship with you - or anyone else, presumably) to interfere with that; he's Muslim, and says his parents must not know about you.
There is a big cultural and religious difference between you which would make any relationship very difficult. The pressure would be on YOU to conform to his and his parents customs, if not religion.
You may very well like him a lot and want him to be your bf. But quite honestly there are a lot of negatives here from what you've told us.
My recommendation would be to cut your losses NOW, before you get any more involved! Believe me, its better to do so early - painful, but easier to move on.
Eventually you'll meet a guy who has more in common with you and more respect for your values.
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