A
male
age
36-40,
*jekim
writes: So I've known this girl for several years, we dated when we first met, but it didn’t work out because we were in school. We've been friends since then; we've fought and been there for each other through a lot. We hang out a lot, once I even asked her out again and she said she didn't want to lose my friendship. A while ago (couple of years) I got drunk and told her I loved her. She seemed really angry and said she didn't want to hang out with me anymore. After a while though we started hanging out again. A lot more recently, tonight we hung out at one of my favourite places to hang out (kind of my secret spot) she told how she's single and she really likes being single and about she didn’t care too much for get ex. How she felt she could be more lazy and stuff when she's single... She had to go but we hugged and I asked if she be up for hanging out again next week she said sure just had to check her work schedule. Not sure what to think, was she trying to tell me something by randomly telling me she's single now. I guess I still have feelings for her...I'm going to email her tonight to see what day week she is free, but what can I say to maybe see if she likes me (or rather if there is something there) What do you think?
View related questions:
broke up, drunk Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (20 March 2013):
Spoiler -
When a friend tells you they don't want to date you because "They're afraid of losing your friendship," that's nice person code for "I like you, but I'm not into at all sexually."
Proceed accordingly.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (20 March 2013):
“it didn’t work out because we were in school” How in the world does being in school make a relationship not work out? I ask because it sounds like an excuse to me.
You ask her out and she says no. You told her you loved her and she cut contact with you. THESE two things are very clear… are you listening to her actions?
“she really likes being single” so her WORDS are now matching her actions. But your not listening are you?
What do I think? I think she likes you as a friend to hang out with but that she's happy being single and does not wish to get involved with you as anything more than friends.
word of caution... DO NOT ACCEPT FWB with her... your heart will be broken.
...............................
A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (20 March 2013):
When I read your post, I got the entirely opposite idea! To me, by going on about how much she is ENJOYING being single, that suggests she has no intention of getting a boyfriend any time soon and that she DEFINITELY does not want to get involved with anyone any time soon.
So that was her way of saying to you that she doesnt want a boyfriend, she is happy being single so dont get the wrong idea and start liking her again.
I think she is has made it CRYSTAL CLEAR to you over the years that she is 100% not interested in you I'm afraid, she stopped talking to you when you told her you loved her, she told you how much she LOVES being single and now she has blown you off when you asked to hang out again because she has to check her 'work schedule'. That is a clear way of saying "I'm way too busy to be hanging out with you".
I think you need to let this one go I'm afraid, you have been flogging a dead horse for way too long and you need to move on. Dont message her to see her again, leave it alone now and put some space between you so you can move on. If you keep trying to be friends with her then you are only prolonging your feelings and it will hurt more. You need some space until your feelings have gone and you have fully moved on.
...............................
|