A
female
age
36-40,
*angerouslove.
writes:Despite all of the drama in my life, (ex boyfriend - new girlfriend) and alot of other things consuming that. I feel like I have opened up a new chapter in my life that I never knew existed. Yesterday, as I was drinking with some friends of mine. My best friend, Whom is a guy .. and I kissed.I feel like I have always had feelings for him, but never realized it, and I'm afraid if we go further with things, it could ruin our friendship or make it awkward, and if we don't, that could also put a strain on our friendship. My other best friend .. Whom is a girl, has had feelings for him in the past. I am not sure if she still does, and this is another unsolved answer that is getting in the way of me trying to move forward with this. I don't know what to do, I really like him alot, but is it worth the possibly of loosing our friendship in the end? or another friendship in return? Please, give me advice on this and help me move forward with this.
View related questions:
best friend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2008): i was in the EXACT same situation, exept for the other best friend liking him but ill get to that in a mo.he had been my best friend for 2 years when he kissed me, and from that moment on i realised how much i liked him. it feels like youve always liked him but never realised it, right? its weird how one moment can change that.i was one of the lucky ones. we talked into the early hours about what we should do, and eventually decided that it was worth the risk. im still with him and ive honestly never been happier in my life. he still get fears that we'll break up and fall out and ever talk to eachother which would be awful because we were so close even before we got together. but we work through it, and if it did go wrong, then i know that id do my best to stay his friend because i couldnt live without him, despite the pain id have to put up with.i say its worth the risk, youll never know if you dont try, right? however, the other best friend thing, well that just makes a complicated situation even worse and i really feel for you. if you take my advice and decide to go for it with this guy, then have a long talk with your other friend too and make sure she tells you her true opinion on it so that theres no hidden hates brewing later on. if she doesnt like it, then to be honest shes not a very good friend. if she really wanted him, then she should have done something about it, and she should want you to be happy. i know it feels like your stabbing her in the back but when you you think about it, shes just as bad for not wanting you to be happy. you only live once so step up and take what you want before it floats away. talking always helps.good luck, i hope she understands and supports you, and i hope it works out well between you and him.if you want a dramatic life, try angling for that happy ending.x
A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (16 June 2008):
 The only way to get any kind of answer on if you should move forward here is to lay the cards on the table and see where everyone stands. I would suggest starting with your girl-friend and see what she thinks of this guy (is she still interested in him or if she's over it)... then tell her about the weekend and what happen, then conclude with your desire to move forward with the relationship, but also express your concern about your relationship and how this would effect it. If her blessing is given, then you have no problem... if she does, find out what her problems are and see if there's something that you two can do about it.
Next, of course, is to speak with the gentlemen. Again, lay the cards on the table, express your concerns and see what he thinks. Don't forget to bring up your girl friend and see what he thinks about that...
As you can see, you need to give both of them the chance to say what they want on this. If after things look favorable, then go for it. The only way is to have that straight-talk conversation here and discover what is on their minds.
Best wishes!!
...............................
|
