A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:How bad is this?In my current relationship that I've been in for years we always have this problem and that's our sex life. The problem is I have a very low sex drive compared to my boyfriend who wants it almost 24/7 (he is older than me by a few years he isn't the same age as me). Anyways recently I've noticed that the only way he turns me on is if he is upset about something or is vulnerable. I don't ask for sex or even make a move on him cause I know he'll say no when he is in that state.He has tired foreplay etc etc but nadda only seems when he is in some kind of emotional state is when I want him. What is wrong with me and how bad is this?
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foreplay, move on, sex drive, sex life Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2014): I suppose you want to see passion or some likeness to it.
Perhaps he just looks sexier when he's upset. You say his
foreplay is tired. You see a spark when he's angry, and when he's vulnerable there is tenderness.
My lady, what you want is "passion."
Maybe vulnerability is so out of character for him, that it gives him more appeal to you. What type of expressions or changes do you notice about him? Maybe if you describe what you see, you'll figure out what it is that turns you on.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2014): Hmmm this is interesting--my bf is like this! If I'm upset/crying about something, he'll comfort me/hug me, and then he starts kissing me and gets turned on! I don't know why that happens…I would be curious to know…
However, if that is the ONLY time you want sex, that seems like an issue to me. He will start to feel unwanted...
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