A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Helo.i usually help my friends and most of the time when they are ok i don't hear from them and this has happend to me for the 3rd time ,i don't understand, like i don't expect something in return when i help someone, but it bothers me so much to help someone i know then when he's ok i can't hear from him/her ,not even a sms to say "hi you helped me alot thanx" i dnt get it ,bt to me i make sure if someone help me i thank him/her and i feel bad if i dnt thank the one who helped me just the same as those i helped to this day nevr heard from them , so how it is like this Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOk in 2012 i was staying at another town.I was studying there.This friend who knows me and he has a friend who knows me as well ,so this friend of my friend was looking for a accomodation to stay.So my friend sent him to me. I welcomed him.I stayed with him for like 8months and we were studying at same univesity and we were from same town Also i used to know him but not used to hang around with him but i thought he was my hometown guy ,so before i welcomed him he was staying at another flat where he use to share and he was paying lot of money,and there where no electricity and when he told me this it made me understnd that i must help him.Then,when he come to stay at my flat we were sharing also but less money ,then 3 days i was regreting about accomodating this guy ,like he even forgot that am the one who helped him to my place ,he acted like a boss on everything.So I went back to my friend who sent him to me and let him know about this issue he was shocked to find out that that guy hes not the way he use to think he is,then we stayed like the whole 8moths together but the relationship was too bad like i use to ask myself that did he remember that i helped him like this ,only to invite a problem.Then time past come dec 2012 he goes home since dec 2012 till today I never even received a call or sms or even whatsapp tx nothing, ok second last year 2013 my neighbour wanted to study at a college so I was at that town where he suppose to study he called me and ask for accomodation iwas not around that town I talked to my friends who helped him , cause at that time he did not know some at that town only me, so they welcomed him and stay with him still even a call or sms to say thank you from him i nver i didn't received it till today when i visit my friends.His friends said he did came to them he stayed with them 2months ,third a friend got job last week so he was looking for accomodation at another town and he asked me if i know someone there of which i replied quickly and talk to my friend who stay and work at that town to welcome him so,till today he is working at that town staying with my friend i never heard from him since not even a sms or call
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2014): I have friends like that. I don't hear from them until they need a shoulder to cry on. I'm there for them all the same.
Some people use your number for emergency calls only. If you lend people money, you're being a fool, and you're inviting them to treat you that way.
It is likely these people are not friends, just people who use you. Learn how to say no, and then tell them why.
How about explaining how you help people, so you'd get better advice.
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