A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend of 3 years and I are having problems.She came into the relationship with a beat up old station wagon in really rough shape. Brakes didn't work, tires were shot, heater didn't work, etc. The thing was a death trap and it always made me nervous to see her drive off in it. It finally kicked the bucket one day and we had to do something about transportation. I had a motorcycle that I was rebuilding that I could get around on for the summer so I told her to just drive my car until she could find something she could afford. It's been 2 years now, she's racked up about 50k miles, and she still hasn't lifted a finger to search for a car. Now she's started to just take off with my car, without any word, for hours on end. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (20 July 2007):
 I would sit down and talk to her hunni.
Maybe she hasn't realised she's supposed to be looking for a new car seen as she's driving around in yours and you seem happy with that.
xxxxxxx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2007): whats the big deal? if you're not breaking up with her then why does it matter if she uses the car? i think you're being a touch possesive, maybe she can't afford to buy a new car
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (19 July 2007):
 Why is she going to go and look for a car for herself when you have been totally happy for her to use yours all this time and obviously not said anything about it.
Talk to her and tell her that you are happy to go and look at cars for her because it would be nice if your car was avaiable for you to use it you wanted to.
Take care.xx.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2007): Hi love.
she probably doesnt even realise your pissed off, so id say Lets go look for a car for you as I really need mine back hun, then find out what budget she has and give her a helping hand to car veiw. Thats all you can do really hun she isnt prob taking the mick its just become natural over time. good luck TAKE CARE LOVE MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (19 July 2007):
 How about you start using the car more of and bring up helping her look for a new one. This might be nicer than flat out saying "you cant have it"
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (19 July 2007):
 Help her start looking for a car. Your input would be valuable to her plus it will motivate her into getting her own car.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2007): Take back the keys, have an honest talk with her (or she will continue to manipulate your generosity and your silence), and tell her she must ask permission to use the car. She will balk at this, because after 2 years, she is convinced it's her car.
Show her the title, insurance, and registration in your name.
If you have to get desperate - switch the spark plugs so she cannot drive the damn thing without your permission - she will get the message then.
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