A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi.I went out with someone on and off for a peroid of the last 4 years, it wasn't the easiest of relationships. I am quite emotional and take things personally, and he was very moody, often blocking me out, refusing to see me because he was having a bad day, these days would quickly turn into one or two days and some times weeks, I took it pretty personally, but generally washed it off as something i was being daft about. In december last year I asked a best friend of mine( male) to lend some money as I was in dire straights. I was honest with my boyfriend about it, who then told me I should have come to him first ( he was struggling for money hence why i didnt) and that I was too close to my best friend and left me as a result. We got back together after christmas and some apologies, and everything was ok for 2 months minus his occasionally moodiness, however in early march he began to act more and more strange, he asked me to move in with him but became more distant so I said it wasnt the right time. While helping him decorate I came across a reciept by accident that proved he had completely lied about where he was, I challenged him on it, and was told i was wrong for looking ( i wasnt I was trying to find a screwdriver) and he spent the next week not talking to me, on the final day he forgived me( so he said) and we went out seperately, but I was starting to have my suspicions there was more to it than he said, there was some funny messages from a girl over his social networking site, and I was a bit concerned, but i put it down to me being daft, untill he ignored my 2 texts that night and when we met up he was quick to go hide in the corner and finish the conversation with someone, i could tell he was talking to someone else by his attitude afterwards, and the morning following the suspicions got the better of me and i checked his mobile phone, to find incriminating messages on his phone from the girl on his social networking site. I asked him and he admitted that if i hadnt have turned up he was planning to meet her for sex, he said it was over our argument and I stupidly forgave him, but i later found out he had slated me at that point. Our relationship went through a rough patch as I struggled to cope with it, and I did shout a few times, but he was quite cruel, telling me i should be greatfull he didnt sleep with her, and started to really hammer home the moods and i left. I regretted leaving, Im not sure why, and contacted him, he was ok to start with but after stupidly sleeping with him he became really nasty, and Im the first to admit I bit back, and said somethings i didnt mean. But now he is blaming me for everything, the breakup, the reason he went to her etc, and Im really finding it difficult, I wasnt a nasty person, im the first to admit im not perfect and have apologised for reacting wrong sometimes, but he really is hammering it home that its my fault. I even went for a sti test today incase he had given me anything, and avoided accusing him, but told him i was going for one, and was told I was mad for telling him and was insulted several times over the texts. What do I do. I still have feelings for the guy but my rational side tells me i need to move on, but due to the lack of answers as to why he has been so cruel and horrid, and conflicting texts, one min telling me he still cares and the next telling me to get stuffed I cant make sense of any of it.Its really starting to bring me down
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