A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hiya all...Well im a 20 year old girl and i think i am bi-sexual, i have never done anything with a female but really want to. The only thing is i have a boyfriend.I have explained to him about everything and he says he doesnt class me being with a woman as cheating as it is not a guy. He doesnt want anything to do with what i do with woman like threesomes or watching so i know he is being genuine.Problem is that i class him being with a guy or girl as cheating, he say thats fine but as long as he doesnt class me as being with a girl to find out what i am then i should go for it. And truth i would, im just worried that im going to feel guilty after and feel as if i have cheated...I really dont know what to think, i have this opportunity to do something I've wanted to do for years but a bit scared... What shoud i do??
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male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (10 October 2010):
 People are not nearly as open minded as they they are when it is actually happening to them.
It is one thing to not see another woman having sex with your gf as a threat, it is another thing to actually have this happening. Knowing she is out there, having sex with someone else.
Open marriages RARELY work out and this would be an open marriage/relationship. Proceed with extreme caution. Even just bringing this up could already have sown the seeds that will break up this relationship. Few people would not ask themselves: "Why ain't I enough for her".
That he is okay with it, is NOT a good sign at all.
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (10 October 2010):
 Here's the thing. Cheating is whatever breaks the rules in a particular relationship. In 95% of all relationships, you having a bisexual affair with a woman while with a boyfriend would be absolutely considered cheating.
However, your boyfriend doesn't see it that way. You may be able to have a talk with him about formally opening the relationship so that you can have a woman as well. If it's agreed upon by both parties, it's not cheating.
However, here's the drawback, and you must take great care here: If you're wanting him to make that kind of concession for you, be prepared to give him an equal concession. How would you feel if he slept with other women on the side? What about other men? If he's not gay, his having meaningless sex with women who aren't you would most likely have to be agreed upon as well. See how that complicated your relationship?
Also, women are typically emotionally driven. What if you develop deep feelings for her? What if she develops then with you? Another serious complication.
And of course, if you two open your relationship, you open yourselves up to a marked increase in the risk of an STD.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2010): ITs cheating. Anytime, your energy, effort, love, time and emotions are used on someone else who isn't your partner (of course dont count kids, friends etc) then its cheating.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (10 October 2010):
 It would be cheating. If it were him you would class it as cheating, so be honest here, if it is you it is still classed as cheating.
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