A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:ive been in a relationship for 1 year. it's been mostly a long distance relationship. im 27 she is 23. i live in one city she lives 5 hours away in another city. we use to live together 8 months ago but she kicked me out for having a big fight with her i lost my temper over something not important and it was bad.i moved in with my parents were ive been staying for 7 months we got back together a month and half later after the break up and recently she wants us to live together agian,and for me to move there agian. just recently a week ago i visited her in her city it didn't go very well we were fighting basically everday i was there, over stupid little things that got me mad and i took it out on her.i was there for a week. she came back to my city with me were she is from as well to visit her family that lives there. she was upset with me when we got back over what happened while i was there. the (stupid arguing) now she is staying with her family and visiting them and returning back to her city in a week. and she is hardly speaking to me. she hasn't called me, ive been doing all the calling. the past week i didn't call or talk to her for 3 days untill the other day. she also mentioned to not call all the time everyday while she is staying with her family. but not to stop calling completly. and ive appologized a few times for what happen when i visited but at the moment she seemes uniterested in my appology and telling her things would be better and i wouldn't make the same mistakes again. she says ive said this before when she kicked me out 6 months ago and we broke up. so she doesn't belive it and doesn't care. i am going to a party in a couple days where she will be there too i was going to give her a heartfelt long appology letter saying everything im feeling and giving it to her at the end of the party. and also may try to see her at her family's house to give her some things of hers in a couple days and possibly talk agin as well. i believe we can fix things i and other things can change and we can put this behind us and be together and work on things and it's worth it in the long run. i love her alot and truly want to not make the same mistakes with her and be happy with her.basically i need help with her what i should be doing and shouldn't how much time would it tke for her to forgive me and things go back to normal if possible and what to do? or if she never contacts me agian after a long period of time is it realy over and she's done?
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broke up, got back together, hasn't called, long distance, moved in, period Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (10 May 2011):
 Hi
Its such a shame when two people love eachother they argue over the silliest things. I would advise you NOT to go to this party, give her some space, cause if you keep doing all the chasing and running after her, it will push her away. Give her time to miss you, Im sure she would love for you both to work things out, but women sometimes can be very stuborn :/ and if you dont give them that break so they can see how much they miss you, they will end up going off you completely. Spend this time thinking about why and what causes these arguements. Do you miss home and friends when you go to live with her? are you upset because she has freinds there and maybe you dont? Or is it something she does in paticular that winds you up? This is something you will definately have to work on, having anger management may help calm your anxietys. If you can both work through this, there is no reason why you shouldn't have a good relationship again.
I hope this has helped
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