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I need a way out, but my heart is in the way. Still living with her, but we've broken up due to my lie.

Tagged as: Breaking up, Crushes, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 October 2014) 2 Answers - (Newest, 12 October 2014)
A male United States age , anonymous writes:

ok, had my GF for a year and a half.

Six months in she revealed everything, and I mean everything, 401K, savings...everything.

She expected the same from me and I wasn't comfortable with that so I just threw some numbers out. Obviously not the real numbers or I wouldn't be here.

It came up a couple of weeks ago and I told her the truth, I'm not a millionaire...Bottom line is I LIED to her and now we are living in the same house and broken up.

Not even sure what question to throw out, I have so many.

The main one would be how do I make this work?

We have been broken up for 2 months, I'm still living in her house because she can't afford it by herself. I have backed myself into a corner, need to get out but my heart won't let me.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2014):

I have to disagree with Abella.

Your girlfriend has not contributed to the mess you are now in.

Next time just be honest.

But for now you either work it out or both find separate accommodation that you can afford alone.

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (12 October 2014):

Abella agony auntYour lie? What about her lie? She cannot afford to live in the apartment unless you help contribute to the cost of living there. Me thinks that she is also worth far less money than she claims.

She was on the lookout for a boyfriend with more money than her so she invented an amount that she said she was worth, financially.

She was happy to allow you to live with her and help meet her outgoings while living in that apartment. Presumably she was happy about living with you, an alleged millionaire, as she imagined that you would look after her eventually.

You developed feelings for her.

I can assure you that she has no feelings for you.

Instead you were her "plan for the future" and as long as she thought you were worth 7 figures you were welcome to stay with her.

But you developed feelings for her. So you trusted her enough to tell her the truth.

You caused her a wake-up call.

You lost your value in her eyes. Yes the lie bothered her, but your lack of funds is the real issue.

She is a gold digger and she thought she had tapped into a rich stream of future gold.

She now needs to be on the lookout for her Next "catch." As soon as she can reel in the next catch you will be propelled out the door at double quick time.

Use your grey matter and get organized now. Find a place and an area you can afford to live in.

Think with your grey matter, not your heart.

You are in love with the sweet accommodating charming lady who laid on the charm after she was certain that she had finally caught a big fish who would keep her in the manner she aspires to live in.

She has no more money than you. But she is on a mission to find a man who does have more than she has.

Sadly I think she conned you and now she is outraged that you told her a lie that completely messed up her plan to live a good life in the future. At your expense, she imagined. Now that the truth has been revealed she chose to break up with you.

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