A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: around a year ago a co-worker and I both left our partners and began seeing other people. we began talking about our problems etc eventually going on a night out with friends during the night i got the vibe she was attracted to me but never acted on it. we remained fairly close texting each other i never really saw her as someone i would be with just a friend eventually we both got back with our partners after this she has pretty much stopped talking to me completely she has problems with her partner again. the problem is now i cant stop thinking about her all the time wishing she would now show an intrest in me i love my partner very much but cant help remembering the bond my co-worker and I had that i over looked before
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male
reader, sevenseals +, writes (27 February 2011):
Unfortunately, your scenario is made exceptionally complicated by the fact that you're currently dating someone.Sometimes, it's best to leave the past in the past. I often think back on my previous relationships and long for some of the memories that really spoke to me; affected me in a very profoundly romantic way. But it doesn't mean that I'm going to attempt to seek them out, especially if we're just friends now.However, if it's really biting you and tearing you apart, then you have to look at this logically and come to a conclusion. It may sound silly, but consider the pros and cons of attempting to communicate with her, again. Think about why you felt the attraction. Sometimes, a very close friendship can be indistinguishable from a romantic relationship, barring the sexual aspects, of course. You might actually miss the connection more than you miss the person.Examine your current relationship and take stock of what's important to you/you're priorities. There's nothing wrong with seeking her friendship again, and that's more than likely what you're going to have to accomplish.It seems frustrating, but if you don't attempt to solve it, it'll only cause more problems than it's worth. Wish you the best of luck!
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (27 February 2011):
This one is simple. You say you love your partner? Why would you think of cheating on her? Think about how you would feel if you found out that your partner couldn't get another man out of her mind. How would you feel if your partner cheated on you?
You can't cheat on her. If you want to go for your co-worker, don't hedge with your partner. That is cruel and underhanded and if you're capable of doing that, you don't deserve either of them.
So it's your decision. If you want to pursue your co-worker, then break up with your partner and set her free. Then you can pursue her. Otherwise, be grateful for the one who loves you.
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A
female
reader, confusedlover10 +, writes (27 February 2011):
it all depends on how much you love the girl that you are with. if you love her then other girls shouldn't matter to you. but, do not hurt the girl that you love by leaving her for someone who you are not sure if they even like you anymore. if she hasn't talked to you in a long time then it is possible that she might have forgotten about you. however, if you are sure that this girl is really interested in you, then you should make sure that she is and break up with the girl that you are with, b/c if you don't then she will be very heart broken, and you definitely don't want to feel guilty about it. the only way you can find out if she is still interested in you is if you try talking to her again and find out if she likes you or not. but please please make sure that she is interested in you before you leave the one you love. hope this helps =)
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