A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i still love this girl so much it hurts and i feel like crying. we tried being friends the first 3 weeks of our breakup. but she said i act crazy asking how she is i slipped i love you a few times as well. sex jokes with friends and simple stuff like talking to each other were tense. she use to tell me and show how much she loves me. she decided to not to talk anymore deleting my number etc. it hurts alot that she seems to not to care. i love this girl all my heart. will time bring her back? it seems to get worse daily. i try talking about it with friends but it dosnt help i try to keep busy but that dosnt help. all i do is think about her and its killing me. i miss just talking to her. help if you can
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (28 April 2013):
 Don't waste your time and mental energy believing and conniving (yourself) that your's and her "relationship" is going to arise from the dead, like Lazarus.....
INstead, direct all your time and attention to getting on with your life... WITHOUT her.....
After a while, you will find her (and her memory) fading from your head... and you will feel a refreshing new beginning starting to take hold....
Good luck.....
A
female
reader, whereisthelove94  +, writes (28 April 2013):
Hello OP.
The first thing to remember is that everybody grieves in a different way. The way you deal with the break up will be different to how she deals with the breakup.
If you feel like crying, let it rain. There is no shame in crying, crying is what makes up human. Crying helps us grieve.
Going from being a couple to friends is a very hard and long process. It will take time. Me and my ex were best friends. We have just come out of a relationship and have tried to keep contact as normal, but it will not work. As long as you still care for and love that person, remaining friends won't work. This will just make things harder for you both. Give it time. If you were destined to be friends, it will work itself out, it not, then life has chosen another path for you.
This sentence;
'she use to tell me and show how much she loves me. she decided to not to talk anymore deleting my number etc. it hurts alot that she seems to not to care'.
Sometimes, my friend, just because someone appears not to care, it doesn't mean that they don't. I care very much for my ex boyfriend, of whom I have just come out of a two year relationship with, and I know I will for a very long time, but we had to cut contact to make things easier for us both. Again this brings us back to the fact that every one grieves differently. Sometime you have to be cruel to be kind. Sometime it is easier to not talk to somebody than have the constant reminder that they are there, but you cannot have them.
You will miss talking to her, I know. It will hurt. But as the saying goes; time is a healer. When one door closes another one opens (unless it's an elevator in which it is the same door that opens and closes). This may be a blessing in disguise. Do not give up opportunities presented to you, they may just be that blessing. It may not seem to help now, but carry on spending time with friends, treat yourself, cry when you need to and when you're ready, move on. If it is meant to be, it will be, if not, again, life has a different plan for you.
You will find happiness eventually. Everybody does.
Love and best wishes,
Sophie
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A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (28 April 2013):
LOVE is hard work at the best of times.Right now yes you do need to keep busy ,make new friends,join a club.It will get easier i know that is not easy to accept now but it will.You talk about TIME well it will do either one of these things I-It will help you to heal.2-It will sort the situation with this girl.Kind Wishes Nora B.
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