A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met this girl at a gig about 10 days ago. we start talking and after 20min chatting i asked her for her number and she said yes but only if you give me yours too. two days later i called but she didnt pick up the phone so i send a txt asking her out but i got nothing that day so i txt her the next day asking her to join me on that evening, i got nothing for a few hours and then i got a txt saying im so sorry for not getting back to you sooner i been very busy at work. so she couldn't make it that night but she invited me to her friends birthday the next day. i went to the birthday and it went really well we kissed about 10 times, danced a bit and chatted all night. at the end of the night i walked her to her car (holding hands on the way) she invited me to a gig for tomorrow and i said sure sounds good. the next day she send me a txt saying if i got home ok what are my plans for that day? also she said that that she was not sure where this gig was and what are her plans? so i said come out with me to a friends bbq but she replied that she had to go to this gig as i know its part of her job. i said no worries have a good night and i speak to you tomorrow. i had the monday off work and she knew that, so she again send me a txt saying im so lucky having that day off and more about the day. i asked her if she wanted to go see a movie that night (monday) she txt back 4 hours later saying she had to work late till 9pm as they just moved offices, but she did say what you doing tomorrow and sorry to be a pain would you like to see a movie then? i said i let her know as i had work and did not knew what time I'll be done. so the next day i send her a txt saying i be done for around 6 and i can meet her for around 7, you still want to meet up? I GOT NOTHING BACK FROM HER. for the first time in a very long time i found somebody that i have real feelings for and thats why im writing this in details and asking for help. why would she give me this options and not reply at all? i know that maybe something it could be wrong with her life and all that but letting the other person knowing it would only take 5min of your time. she also invited me to another gig on monday for today but again i have still waiting to hear from her. CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHATS GOING ON? why give options to a guy and not act on it? i did give her a call yesterday to see just if she was ok but got no answer? im confused. WHAT SHOULD I DO?
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male
reader, kenny +, writes (15 May 2008):
 Im have been going through a similar sort of thing, i have been seeing someone, that like yourself is the first person i have liked in ages. We have been out a few times then she just disapeared, she stopped replying to my texts. What i did was left it for about a week and half, because as the other aunts said constantly texting or calling someone is a real turn off. Anyway after the week and a half i sent a final text saying i hope you are well, im not the sort of guy to keep chasing someone so i am going to leave it here, then wished her all the best. Well she replied back in under an hour. I think because she knew i was basically saying good by, not playing ball anymore she quickly got me back. So my advice would be to give it a while, maybe 2 weeks then send that final message.
All the best
A
female
reader, Tremor  +, writes (15 May 2008):
 Leave her alone for a while - she probably feels smothered. No-one likes a stalker, and 'twist of fate' has it right - neediness is a turn off, especially in people you only recently met.
Don't be constantly waiting for texts or phone calls. If she wants to contact you, then she will.
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