| A
male
,
*ally
writes: Hiya, I recently posted about a girl that I like, and thanks for the advice. However nows theres quite a few problems laying in my path. My friends usually come to me with their relationship problems, but when it comes to my own I have nobody to turn to because I refuse to lumber somebody else.Sometimes I can be quite sarcastic and that often leads me to being nasty. I know that sounds silly to many but I never used to be such a bad guy. I think about it all the time and I really dont like who I am anymore. So Im trying to change, and I know that sounds silly but its not like anyone has to live with me apart from me. People say I dont need to change who I am but they dont know what its like to be me.I hate ego, but I know some girls like me. But there are no other girls I would consider dating now, but the GCSEs are far from over and she needs good grades. My career kind of depends on the grades of the exam Im taking tomorrow and Im in serious trouble with that. She will be disaspointed if she doesnt get A* in many of her exams so I cant ask her out.Also.. she has a date for prom. When she's with her girl mates she describes him as "fit" and Ive always been a little bit jealous. So naturally I cant ask her. Just to add to the list of problems her best mate likes me and Im not sure if that would hold her back. I mean Id never go out with my best mates crush unless I liked them so much it hurt and I knew my mate was okay with it. So there in lies the first lot of problems. They can be overcome with enough effort and hope.26th May: we went to the cinema and saw Xmen3. Was a laugh, guess the people who were trying to watch it got a lil annoyed at us talking but thats life. Sounds pathetic but we had a lil flirty foodfight and suchlike. After that we met up with people.27th May: we stayed at a mates house with other people, we were close and hugged and things. Just small things like sharing a chair, sleeping next to each other.. you get the idea hopefully. No sexual activities at all have taken place. We watched a film then I woke up next to her.28th May: we went to the airshow, I was kinda shattered n ended up falling asleep on her a lil, she blocked the sun out of my eyes for me, I dont know if that means anything to most people but I thought it was nice.I got the feeling she liked me then but also that she was holding back for something. Whether she was slowly going off me or that she is concentrating on her exams. I havent a clue anymore.. Heres some more examples. Possibly where it changed.29th May: we went to the cinema with one of her mates. It was the one in Basildon so I had trouble getting there and back, had to borrow money and everything.. but I went to see her. Anyway they were late so couldnt talk then, and then her Mum was there so we went out so she had to go. Id spent like 15 quid to sit with her for 2hrs and watch a film that wasnt even good... Which I say is worth it but I just dont know if she sees it that way.1st June: we went to The Mill, a live band place in Rayleigh, the music was crap and I was in a crummy mood as Id been thrown out of my house so not to ruin peoples moods I decided to sit in the toilets for 30 mins. That night I stayed at her house with her mate that fancies me. It makes it so hard to do anything with the girl I like when shes there. I was still in a bit of a bad mood and didnt sleep at all that night. The next day I spent the day at her house and we went to the park, she doesnt seem so close anymore. She doesnt come to sit near me, and I actually went to use her as a head rest as a joke and she recoiled. Maybe I shouldnt let these things get to me, but they do and I cant help thinking Im a bad person.I may sound pathetic to some, but I dont want to talk to my friends about this kinda thing. We're both 16 and some people are cynical of young love. It may be just a crush but I still dont know what to do. If anybody has any advice in any form it would be much appreciated..Wally -x-P.S The exams start again tomorrow and end (except for a few) around the third week of June.. Prom is on the 6th July.
View related questions:
crush, flirt, her ex, jealous, money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, UsuallyConfused  +, writes (5 June 2006):
Ok I think her friend that's keen on you in definently holding her back. I mean I would never do that to a friend and I know they would never do that to me. Even if you was keen on you for a minute (which she might have been but also being a girl in her early twenties I can understand high school girl stuff and she might have been pushing things with you as an ego boost or making a point to her friend, who she still would never hurt by getting together with you but would like to show her she could get the guy, sorry but teenage girls can be bitches big time!) she is probably just doing her thing and concentrating on her exams and her friends. My suggestion although you might not want to hear it is that if this girl is as nice as you say she is then put in the hard yards, give it a month or so (just because she has a date for the prom doesn't mean it won't be a time to talk to her) and;
a. try and find a nice friend of yours to set up with her mate that's keen on you, gives you an excuse to hang around with the whole double dating thing, even ask for her help and it also clears up the friend keen on you thing.
b. concentrate on your exams and be just as cool with her as she is with you - DON'T act too keen or she will lose any interest she has. You have already given her reason to think of you as more then a friend so now cool off and see how quickly she notices and starts to flirt again.
c. have fun and dont beat yourself up over the kind of person you are. If you don't like the way you are thinking then get into habits to change that. There is a positive in EVERY situation. You just need the perspective to see it.
Good luck!
|
