A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hia, i've got a major problem and it's really tearing me up cause i don't know what to do. I've just turned 18, and my parents know this woman (let's say her name is amy) and have done for a few years,and they are very good friends.She's married to a man (lets say his name is marcus) and has been for 2 years. He's 24 and she is 25. Basicly i have known the couple since i was about 16. They have one child who is 3 years old. The first time i saw 'marcus' i fancied him, of course i didn't expect anything, i thought it was just a crush, but marcus and amy often came to our house for dinner, or me and my family go to theirs. I always fancied him, and it was like i only wanted him, it was a stupid feeling like there would never be anyone else like him, but we talked all the time and he helped me with any problems i had, and we were pretty close. Amy and me didn't get on that well, mainly cause i didn't want to get on with her cause i wanted Marcus. About 3 months ago, Marcus came to the house to see my mum but there was no one in as they were at work it was just me. I let him come in and he got wine out and it was really nice. We talked for ages, and then i kissed him. He responded and kissed me back. Mum came in then and he left. But about a week later, he came to see me when mum n dad were out and told me he had fallen in love with me. I told him how i felt and we had sex. He's told me now that he plans to leave Amy and that he wants to be with me. I don't know if i should believe him, but i love him so much. He doesn't come round that much, as he doesnt want anyone to find out about us that way, he wants to tell people when the time is right. I love him so much and i don't want this to end. What should i do?
View related questions:
at work, crush, married man Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Carrot2000  +, writes (10 May 2010):
 *He doesn't come round that much, as he doesnt want anyone to find out about us that way, he wants to tell people when the time is right.*
Translation: My life with my family and my reputation is too valuable for anyone to find out what I'm doing with you. I will continue to sneak around and sleep with you as long as you allow it, but I can never take you or a relationship with you seriously. You're just the side piece, and since you've been lusting after me since you were 16, I know I can get in your pants fairly easily. Plus, you're young and have no life experience, so you'll believe anything I tell you.
Wise up and grow up. This man is using you and you're about to screw your life up big time. You may think you're mature, but you really are not woman enough to play this game.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (10 May 2010):
 Married men are off limits. That is the golden rule of life.
Get involved with one and your life will go downhill all the way and your heart will be shattered into a thousand pieces.
That is the bitter and putrid fruit you will have to take when you get involved with any married man.
He is only using you for sex and he will promise you the sky and the moon for you .
Wake up from your stupor and walk away from him . He is all deceit and lies and nothing more.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2010): first plz stop what ur doing....im speaking frm xperience i was seeing also a married man n oh how i regret it he never left his wife n i was just being used by him.....leave him.....he does not deserve u...n u need to find a man that will only make you his priority not some one elses kid.....plz never listen to a married man.....
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (9 May 2010):
Married man = you're about to be used.
Even if he does leave her, this won't work out. First up, you'll always have his child around to remind you that he has another life, and you'll have a lot of guilt. Secondly, if he can cheat on his wife and the mother of his child, he can cheat on you. Thirdly, you'll have such an appalling reputation that you won't be able to do anything without being judged. Fourthly, you can be sure that his ex will make life hell as much as she can for both of you.
And that's just for starters, if he leaves her.
What if he doesn't leave her. Which he probably won't. Well then you''l get used, your reputation will be destroyed and you'll be the one who ends up hurt.
It's a well known fact that women who have affairs with married men come of a lot worse than the other way around. You really stand to lose a lot here. Imagine if it doesn't work out, but it gets around that you were seeing a married man who had a young child. You'll feel suffocated. the fact is, he's married. Leave him well alone, or you'll get hurt. He is so blatantly not going to leave her. He's just going to use you.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2010): This married man took your parents hospitality and he abused it , just as he is abusing and manipulating you in the guise of 'love'. He is a married man. You know his wife. He has a young kid. You don't talk about any guilt or remorse of trying to take someone elses husband. How will you face his wife? His child? Your friends? Your parents? Do you know what the term homewrecker is and what it means? I need you to be honest with yourself, if he is cheating with you surely he will cheat on you in the future.this married man will not leave his wife and kid for you. He will still have sex with you because you are providing him with it but please do not expect him to be faithful to you.
...............................
|
